How Doubting Witnesses Can Fade & Avoid Shunning
One of my favorite bloggers, Isaac J. Harris (The Atheist Geek), has recently written an article called, “Jehovah’s Witness To Atheist: How Doubting Witnesses Can Fade, Avoid Shunning”, which was published another favorite blogger’s website: Austin Cline for About.com.
I wanted to share it with you here because the article provides a valuable list of to-do items for anyone (Atheist or not), who is thinking of leaving the Watchtower Society of Jehovah’s Witnesses. I believe this advice applies to anyone who has found that they do not believe the teachings of the Jehovah’s Witnesses and wants to leave without suffering shunning by family members and friends.
In this article, Mr. Harris goes into depth discussing the following items:
- Seek advice from those who’ve done it.
- Have a plan.
- Have excuses ready and cover your tracks.
- Skim the Watchtower’s literature for upcoming discussions about apostates or shepherding calls.
- Make yourself hard to reach.
- Move to another congregation.
- Be wary of persistent Witnesses.
- Make new friends.
Of course, every situation is unique and these tips will not always prevent shunning. They can however, protect you from harassment and emotional abuse during your exit process.
Read the full article here: http://atheism.about.com/od/jehovahswitnesses/a/HowToFade.htm











(2 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5)
“In this article, Mr. Harris goes into depth discussing the following items:”
Moxy, just so you know, you can always call me Isaac.
@Isaac… well now I know
Great article!
Why fade? You’ll just make life harder for you. Just do a disappearing act away from the JWs you know! Without a trace. They can’t disfellowship an MIA.
MIA can still get you disfellowshipped, especially if they find you doing anything remotely un-witness like.
People are disfellowshipped in absentia every day.
I say good thing if you just fade, and then never look back. I believe one shouldn’t even letter write to disassociate as no adult needs to excuse them selves out of anything they no longer wish to do/practice. What is this, a company that pays you for a service??? If you have faded and gone MIA, then that means no contact w/JW is important to you nor should be. And if no contact, why would one care if they disfellowship you. There Is a saying I love and use often “what others think of me is none of my business”…
Of course, if you are missing your family because of this separation from the JW, then I can understand. My heart goes out to them…but friends. Please, why would you want to associate with people who don’t want you, just the way you are. In life we need to keep on changing and embracing change. If you are no longer a JW, make new friends, join, go out after work w/collegues (Now you can with out feeling guilty)… You’ll be fine…. And if they come knocking looking for you, be nice and tell them with a smile… what ever I am doing at the moment is what I am going to continue doing… Tomorrow I just don’t know” if they say something further… you say “ I am sorry, I don’t accustom to repeat myself , this conversation is over!!!” AND THEN CHANGE THE SUBJECT.. RAINY DAY HA… I herd tomorrow will be nice…. (never invite them in, and right after the change of subject say goodbye have a wonderful time.
One thing you need to understand, once you leave the JW they go from being friends to being acquaintances. Treat them as such.
MIA can still get you disfellowshipped, especially if they find you doing anything remotely un-witness like.
People are disfellowshipped in absentia every day
ONLY if there is proof of wrongdoing. Techinically, the WT. does not permit this practice, but I agree, it has been done. But I agree with the MIA method. There was a young man everyone said gave great talks, and no one knew what happened to him, and that was in the 80’s, maybe the pioneer of MIA, and fading? Anyway, interesting article.
ONLY if there is proof of wrongdoing. Techinically, the WT. does not permit this practice,(disfellowshipping Inabstansia, but I agree, it has been done. But I agree with the MIA method. There was a young man everyone said gave great talks, and no one knew what happened to him, and that was in the 80’s, maybe the pioneer of MIA, and fading? Anyway, interesting article.
yeah, they’ll disfellowship if so much as one old crotchety holier then thou goes to an elder and says ” i saw so and so talking to those republicans!” or ” i saw so and so buying a cart full of toys and it was just before christmas” or whatever.
hell, this time last year a couple elders dropped in on my brother (MIA for 6 years) and tried to get him to commit to being reproved and go back to meetings or commit to disassociation.
they were asked to back down by other elders, but you never can tell.
as to the article, well, the first most important thing is to know who you are personally. until then you’ll never sleep at night.
the best way to go forward with confidence, and to ween yourself from late a.m. anxiety attacks, is to be armed with information.
you must KNOW the FACTS. you have to be prepeared to go to the mat over the false prophecies, doctrinal flip flops and pagan overtones of the founder.
you have to be prepared that you might lose people. people that it would cut your heart out to lose.
finally, you must live your life, as you are, being who you are, and realise that it isn’t you that has anything to hide. it isn’t you who demands lock-step devotion and rock-ribbed certitude. it isn’t you that demands outrageous belief with no proof, it isn’t you that preaches the virtue of poverty while wearing a 1000 dollar suit and flying first class to deliver sermons for a living. it isn’t you that assaults individual accomplishment. it isn’t you that flat-out INVENTS theology out of whole cloth then labels it ‘from jehovah” knowing full well it’s untenable and will sooner or later be abandoned.
no. it’s them. they lied. pathologically. they made false prophecies. they make up theology as they go. they demand servitude. they have no proof for divine direction. they tell you sacrifice yourself to doctrine when the doctor says you need blood. they flip and flop doctrine every district convention. they tell people to waste lives, oppurtunity, education and relationships.
then! then they have the audacity to label us the villains! they have the GALL to say WE are enticed by OUR own vanity! they assign false motives, attribute every sinsiter intent and daily pray for the horsemen of the apocalypse and the angel of death to swoop down and smite anyone not slaving for the watchtower.
and we worry about shunning. it’s sad but true.
being shunned would be quite a bother for many of us.
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