Ten Years After Leaving the Watch Tower
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Author: Moxie
Tags: ex jw, Former Jehovah's Witness, Watchtower Society
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This month marks the one year anniversary of this blog and along with that, one year after I finally found the courage to vocalize my feelings about my experiences as a child raised to be one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. This year, 2009, also marks my 10 year anniversary of my leaving the organization. My purpose in writing about past experiences has never been to dwell on the past but rather the opposite, I had hoped to write away my pain and put the past to rest. The humble beginnings of this blog were nothing more than a private sounding board for me to express the frustration and pain that I had felt as a young woman who had lost everyone she knew and loved to an organization; loved ones who valued conformity and loyalty to that organization more than their own flesh and blood.
Why did it take me a total of roughly 9 years to finally express my emotions? Simply put, the answer is fear and indoctrination. After initially leaving the congregation of Jehovah’s Witnesses I went through phases where I experienced virtually every emotion in the book. I imagine that this is fairly typical of former Witnesses and other cult-escapees in general. The first phase was denial and avoidance. The sudden shunning I experienced and resulting isolation and fear triggered a reaction whereby I simply tried to deny the pain I was feeling. This lead to a phase of partying, drinking and in general avoidance of real life all together. After that became tiring, I began to reassess my beliefs. I was again fearful and asked myself, “What if the society is right after all?” I felt that I had to address this question and make an informed decision as to my beliefs. I felt that in a sense, being raised in the Organization put me at a disadvantage in that I didn’t have to opportunity to chose that religion, it didn’t have to make sense or ring true to me, it simply was what I was taught from infancy. I still remember the words of my 12th grade English teacher who said in one of his lectures, “We believe the reality that is presented to us.” I needed to assess the teachings of Jehovah’s Witnesses from an objective standpoint and ask myself, do I really believe this and does this sound like truth to me? Ultimately, I had to make an informed decision and either make it my own or else put it behind me and move on once and for all.
This lead to a second phase of intensive religious study including the core beliefs of the Jehovah’s Witnesses and a comparative analysis of many other religions including the Mormons, other Christian faiths, Buddhism and even to a smaller extent, Islam. The result of my studies was a general dissatisfaction with all organized religions on the basis that they were all interpretive, and are arguably the creation of men. This lead me into a third phase, where I considered myself spiritual but wholly apposed to organized religion and to some extent questioning the nature of a god/creator. It was during this time, after I had facts about the Organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses, enough to prove in my mind beyond a reasonable doubt that inspite of the best intentions that the religion was false and interpretive. I began to feel a whole series of emotions that had been locked away since my disfellowshipping (absentia). I felt very angry at the hypocrisy of the organization (which was what lead to my exit in the first place). I finally felt the devastating sadness at losing my family and friends. And the condescension I experienced at their hands was more than painful; the irony was unavoidably obvious. I also felt guilty for causing my parents so much pain. They had made repeated attempts to get me to return to meetings saying, “It doesn’t matter why you go, if nothing else do it for us. Don’t you miss your family.” These kinds of comments were excruciating to bear. I found myself considering attending meetings and lying my way back into the society for no other reason than to be able to associate with my family again. Ultimately I couldn’t bring myself to do that. I had left because I was discusted with the hypocrisy in the congregation, and I was determined that if nothing else I would not become a hypocrite myself. Eventually my sadness and guilt turned to anger and after a time that too subsided.
Life went on as it does, one day at a time and I was generally happy, focusing on my career and trying to keep busy when I began to question bigger issues. I would often find myself deep in thought, contemplating our existence, it’s purpose if there was one, and in general the nature of a god or a creative force. I began to realize that while I had studied religion furiously, after all these years I had remained completely ignorant on the subject of evolution. More than anything I was curious to understand the theories so as to put my mind at ease and so that I could refute such “nonsense”. So began the next stage in my life. I picked up the most familiar source of information on evolution, the Creation book by the Watch Tower Society. I read it cover to cover. I found it entirely unconvincing, simply because it was written in such a way that it made ridiculous claims without evidence, it misquoted or misrepresented its cited sources, it presented wild extrapolations that left me staring at the page dumbfounded and thinking, how does that information back up the society’s statement? Basically, after reading this book I had expected to have at least some of my questions answered but the opposite happened. I found that I had more questions than before and more curiosity about evolution in general. The Creation book was so weak and unconvincing in my mind that I started to actually give more thought to evolution as a possibility. And so I began reading other books; books by biologists, physicists, historians, botanists, etc. The result is that today, I see the evidence that a creator was not necessary for life to begin stacked highly on one side, while I see no evidence and rather the requirement of faith to believe that a god/creator does in fact exist.
I feel the need to explain that I don’t broadcast my beliefs here to convince others of the same but simply to express the process at which I arrived at my current state of mind and the emotional process I’ve gone through over the last 10 years. The point being that it took years of uncertainty and doubt, the requirement of faith, fear of doctrine, anger at hypocrasy, lonliness, guilt and sadness to finally arrive at a place where I feel content that while I don’t have all the answers I have finally found some facts which support and give evidence to a plausible explanation about the biggest questions I ever had. This was never the case with religion and while it might be for some that was not true for me.
Today, I continue to try to expand my knowledge and understanding of the world; of science, of history and of society. I couldn’t affix one label to define my views, instead I’d attach a number of “ists” to the list, such as atheist, humanist and environmentalist. I feel that for the first time, I’m living in the ‘now’. I’m trying to be a contributing member of society and while appreciating each day to it’s fullest I endeavor to live life with no regrets.
While many will have views that differ from mine, I find encouragement in listening to and sharing stories with other former Jehovah’s Witnesses. We share a kinship regardless of our current beliefs. People often try to place a division between believers and non-believers and I wholly reject that notion. I am reminded of Raymond Franz’s words in his book Crisis of Conscience where he expresses the sentiment that the major flaw with the Organization is that it focuses on traditional beliefs and complicated interpretations instead of focusing on the truly deep things of the bible, namely the deep love of Jesus Christ and his Father. While I do not personally believe the bible as a divine book, I wish that more Christians were like Raymond Franz in that they are Christ-like and not just Christian. I believe that if religious or non-religious we all lived by the ideal of loving our neighbor as our self and doing to others as we would have them do to us, then the world would be a much different and better place.
After 10 years of question and doubt, there are still questions but there is no fear or guilt felt in the pursuit or examination of answers. I can honestly say I have few regrets and much, much more that I have to be grateful of. I have come to a place that is satisfying intellectually and emotionally. In the year that has passed I have had the privilege of meeting and corresponding with many, many wonderful people; some are still Jehovah’s Witnesses, brothers, sisters and even elders; some are now Christian, and some are Atheists. I am always amazed, moved, comforted and sometimes even saddened when other former witnesses contact me through email and share their own experiences. If nothing else there is an overwhelming sense that I am not alone, we are not alone. Regardless of our beliefs, there is a commonality that we share and I find that it serves to support us in our effort to recover from the edicts of the society. Many stories I have heard contain significant parallels, others tell of experiences that I can’t imaging living through. What seems true to me is that unwittingly or not, the Watch Tower Society of Jehovah’s Witnesses has caused a world of hurt to many wonderful people.
My purpose in writing here and sharing my story has never been a vindictive or malicious one. No, I have always sought to be honest in my recollections, and to be considerate of all sides of the story. If I were to stress one thing it is that the pain I feel today is not about my own personal loss, but that I feel an almost overwhelming sense of sadness along with compassion and pity for the ones who hurt me and are still trapped in the confines of a 100-year old religion. A religion that has set arbitrary and un-biblical doctrine and whose governing body sets itself up as the spiritual authority over the members. Never have I been so reminded of the Pharisees of Jesus day than in the society of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Yes I believe that people are for the most part sincere and earnest, yet I also believe that they have lost their Christian joy, that they live by traditions of men and that few “make the truth their own”. In fact I feel it’s fair to say that many Jehovah’s Witnesses have never even read their bible through from cover to cover (something I’ve done even as an Atheist) but instead rely upon the published words of a printing corporation in New York to tell them what the bible says. I remember the words of Paul to the Bereans where he commended them for examining his words to see if they were indeed so. This I believe is something that few Jehovah’s Witnesses do today. I was particularly shocked at the September 2007 Kingdom Ministry, where Jehovah’s Witnesses were admonished to refrain from meeting in non-sanctioned groups to study the bible. And that they should always refer to the society’s publications when reading the bible to aid in their understanding of things. This is characteristic of the level of control the Organization exerts over its members and their lives. The price of this kind of domination has been high. Divorce, broken homes, child abuse, suicide, and death by refusal of some medical treatment, can be listed as some of the most negative side effects.
I have said many times before in conversation with friends that I do not believe there is a purposeful corruption within the organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses but that it is simply a case of the blind leading the blind. I believe this to be true from the lowest levels of the society all the way up to its highest ranks. This is a statement that has been made by many many others including the previously mentioned Raymond Franz, a former member of the Governing Body, to former Bethel workers, to your average Joe ex Jehovah’s Witness.
My anguish today is different than it was when I first left the society and found myself virtually abandoned by friends and family both immediate and extended. At the time, as a teenager I found myself an alien of sorts in a world where I distrusted and feared just about everything. All of a sudden to find one’s self alone, without guidance and structure, without a listening ear or trusted advise, is a very terrifying position to be in. Raised to believe that the world outside the organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses is a dangerous place, one that is controlled by Satan and his demons, that people at every turn are dishonest and dangerous, I found myself isolated, detached and terrified. Today, I count myself among the lucky ones. Literally speaking, as one who lived to survive and come out the other end not worse for wear but actually a happier, more educated, and an emotionally stronger human being—others have not been so lucky.
For what it’s worth I am dedicating this one-year anniversary post to those former Jehovah’s Witnesses who have suffered at the hands of a man-made organization who has exerted burdensome control over their lives and the lives of those they love. To those who have felt so alone and abandoned that tragically they felt there was no other way out than to take their own life, to those who have been rejected by their mate for their differing beliefs, to those who have been shunned by their families and friends, to those children who have suffered sexual abuse at the hands of men who were protected by the organization, and to those that live in perpetual fear of the society’s doctrine even after they have chosen to absence themselves from the congregation. I personally know many such people, my heart goes out to them and the countless others who share their circumstances.
10 years marks a significant turning point for me. I am no longer afraid, I no longer feel alone. I feel empowered by the combined strength of those who have experienced the same and realize the organization for what it really is. My frustration lies in the hypocrisy and perhaps unintentional corruption of the organization. My hope is that it will be exposed not for my own personal satisfaction but for the good and well being of the people whose lives are influenced by it in a negative way. My hope is that there will be insurmountable pressure to at least trigger reform that will better the lives of Jehovah’s Witnesses and prevent future suffering. While I don’t hold my breath for this to happen any time soon, I believe that through combined effort, by revealing the truth about the organization this will eventually be unavoidable.
As I said, I count myself one of the fortunate ones. I am grateful to those who have shared their stories with me, these stories have given me strength and courage to move on from the past and try to affect a positive change for the future.
Photo credit: Flickr, MrTruffle
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Thank you Moxie! You have given me a glimmer of hope that I can pull through all of this pain. I’ve been out of the WT society for 4 months now. I knew it would be hard being cut off from my family but I thought I would be able to handle it. It has turned out to be a more crushing experience than I could have ever imagined. I don’t think I will become happier over night or any time soon but hopefully one day I can be free from the WT mind control. Thank you again for all of your articles.
Certified Intergalactic! Congratulations for your blog’s one-year anniversary!
I lost someone near and dear to me who had been raised in this faith and couldn’t reconcile the real world with what he had been taught to believe. He hit a low point in his life while being shunned because of things he “allowed” in his life and committed suicide. Before he died he told me that non-believers were considered “walking dead” and that since he was being shunned he was as good as dead anyway. Even after all these years I’m still angry. No religion that could cause a good man to feel he had no living future could be a good religion.
Hi There! I read the whole article, and am a little dissaqppointed that you fail to realize God loves you all the time or that he really did create everything but I am sure that he is still watching over you and is pleased about the good decisions you have made. Remember, just because organized religion is not for you is no reason to give up on the one who formed you is the womb little missie! lol Love and Peace!
LOL Really, in my darkest days of drug abuse, I felt very close to God, and it is because He was there for me, and just because JW’s are studying with me now does not mean that they know “THE TRUTH” I know and knew lots of truths before they came along, and I am just blessed to have them as friends if you want, write me and share some more on what you think, I am seeking objectionary views!
Hey Moxie,
I watched a couple of YouTube videos that you did. I somehow attract JW’s to my door every year or so. Today they showed up again. I don’t mind engaging them but find it a bit frustrating. I want to understand more about their view so that I can perhaps challenge them or get them to see a glimmer of truth. Do you think there is any chance of that? Or am I wasting my time? Sometimes I wonder if God brings them to me b/c I preach GRACE to them. Anyway, blessings on you and your journey.
K
I salute you for having the courage to express your pain and frustration and everything else involved with being raised a JW. I’m with ya! It’s been about 20 years for me, although I don’t really have a specific date where I finally figured it all out. It continues to pop up through anger and frustration with my family, and distant memories that I now realize have had a lasting impact. So while I do think it will be something we always will live with, surviving it and now using our brains to be critical thinkers and live our lives as we choose (as opposed to the fear tactics we grew up with) is something to be celebrated and congratulated. You did something so many of your peers have not…you stood up, used your own mind, and discovered that life has so much more to offer than a limited religion.Congratulations!
I, too, was raised in the “Kingdom Hall”. I told my mom at age 12 that I didn’t believe the way she did. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Thank you for the forum; especially for those of us whom, after study, became atheist.
I just became a jehovahs witness about 4 months ago since then my father will not talk to me because he doesnt believe in religion and he sees JW as a cult. Since I have started to study everything seems to make sense to me, maybe 10 years down the road i will have a different view on it but everyone who is there is really nice and i am learning a lot to me non of them seem pushy or bad or anything like that. there are people that leave religion every day not just JW but all religions and there are some who stick with it until they die. i have always believed there is a god even before i started to study. I commend you for what you have done in your life, the first 22 years of my life i lived in “satans world” and to tell you the truth i was scared, people killing people, suicides, rape, violence,. then when i became a JW it seemed like i had a forcefield around me protecting me from all of the worlds bad ways. like i said maybe in 10 years i will have a different prospective but to me it seems like they are seperating themselves from the danger of the outside world and who wouldnt want to be safe and protected??
i was difellowshipped 30 yrs ago i’m 62 and my sister and her family are jws they don’t talk my mom was a jw before she died she said i am so sorry i pushed you into that religion she felt guilty she talked to me she did not shun me i loved her dearly.
I married a JW after a long courtship that involved two years going to the Kingdom Hall, Bible study etc.
I was a lapsed Catholic and before I studied the Bible I was disinterested in religion generally. I was horrified at the contents of this dreadful collection of myths, violence and misogyny,and during the process became a privately strident atheist (and someone who has donated blood 174 times).
I how have two beautiful sons, as well as a wife who loves me dearly, who are being raised in the faith. Naturally this causes me some private distress, but I seldom rock the boat.
I have absolutely no time for any religion, which to my mind is little more than tribalism under various names. It beggars all belief when one can laugh indulgently at a child’s wonder in a fairy story, yet give straight faced credence to a loving God who feels it necessary to create a son then kill him to assuage his hurt feelings. Let’s leave aside the snake thing!
In conclusion I have to say that all the JW’s I have mixed with are decent human beings, and losing my father in law affected me more than losing my natural father. He called me his other son, despite knowing my take on religion and I loved him deeply.
Wow, I watched a couple of your videos, and I’m very impressed! You speak very well with sincerity and honesty. I too left the “Society” years ago. And still after all these years, I can’t believe that I was brainwashed as a kid. But like you, I was a child and had no control over the deception that was controlling me and programming my mind. I was born & raised in Queens N.Y., so I was only a forty minute drive to the headquarters in Brooklyn. And yes, I too am sorry for all the doors I knocked on, as if I (a teenager) knew better than anyone else. I was very self righteous. I live in Phoenix AZ now, and if you’re so inclined, please feel free to contact me. I think it would be nice to develop friendships amongst those of us who experienced the wrath of the Watchtower Society and their beliefs. Roger - rojovo@cox.net
Moxie,
Hello. I am one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. I do respect your decision, and in this post, I don’t intend on belittling YOU. I feel the need to express my sense of urgency that I feel. All that is needed to prove that the Bible is, in fact, God’s Word, is to point to Daniel’s Prophecy and show the calculation that leads us to the year 1914 as the year Jesus was installed as King and Satan was hurled to the earth. And to prove the point further, there are secular historians wholook back and indeed say that the year 1914 marked the turning point of the world’s affairs. AND, if you look at all other religions and try and find the love that the Witnesses share, you will NOT find it. If you stop thinking about how restrictive The Organization can be (which is confused with protectiveness), and start thinking about how much fullfilling life you will experience in the new system, then going on living with the pressure one feels with being one of just a few rare gems found in the world is SO worth it. Kenneth D is right when he says that the many restrictions that are experienced from the conscience built by True Bible study actually does serve as a protection from the attrocious crimes and vile acts commited in this world. And if you are thinking that there are indeed many good things in this world, wouldn’t it be BEAUTIFUL to live in a world where the words associated with pain and suffering won’t exist? Where you will know and love every person on the planet because you will finally have eternity to associate with your neighbors? And look it just might be the case where you are seeing some hypocritical people. No ONE is perfect, YET. There are witnesses who are indeed babtized, but it doesn’t mean that they are TRUE JEHOVAH’S WITNESSES. a TRUE JW ALWAYS thinks of how his actions are representing Jehovah, but sometimes we slip up, because again, NO ONE IS PERFECT YET. We are people who see spiritual darkness, and try and spread the Bible’s Light wherever we go, backing up everything we say with God’s Word.
So I say to you, the time is short. There is a great sense of urgency. Who wouldn’t want to live in a Paradise where everyone is perfect, and where there is no suffering of any kind?
Cheers,
Thanks Thomas for reminding me why I left. Nice post Moxie. Even after leaving it’s taken decades to reprogram myself from that ‘ theocratic drivel’. Read some books. Miss a few meetings. Commit though crimes. Cut a hole in the fence.
Only problem with your position Thomas is that the numerology of the old testament is based upon superstitious mumbo jumbo and so the voice of jehovah speaks with the dumb rumble of human ontological uncertainty rather than any mystical edifying love for his children. You’d think the Almighty would make it easy to understand what the rules were from the beginning. First you have figure out which the right organization to join in order to receive even hope to receive the same Eternity ™ that they are all selling. Seems a bit complicated and frankly tortuously bitchy for the omniscient being to go to all that trouble to prove that he’s the Daddy that loves us most. Self esteem issues perhaps, or just another franchise of the the ultimate pyramid scheme. At least pick a religion where it’s messiah actually existed.
Take Care,
Dan E.
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Congratulations!
Don’t corrupt your minds. You are not alone. We”the walking dead people” are happy and secured in our life. Them, the “Jehovah loving people” are perfection of a book sort ditiwit’s, puhleassse!! Follow you hearts and be well educated. Faith is an interpersonal thing but it should not be a prison. Sadly in this case it is. You are still trying to come together with the real world where “Satan” rules (again Oh please!!!), and understand the way’s. You are in loving world, seek and you will find more loving people. Enjoy your life.
I think all JW’s should wear a robe like christ and walk around. You should not work in “Satans” world and make money to live, by doing so you are doing work for him and praying to Jehovah as well “this is a double standard”. Shun yourself and go plant an olive tree or something and grow your own food and eat your own sowing away from society. I especially love it when people say to me you need to be saved. Lol - by what, the bell. If that is the case I have been saved many times. Have safe sex, practise good hygeine, have many positive friends and avoid the cult like thinking people. Good luck!
Dear Thomas,
I like your posting such nice use of words .. makes me feel like I wan’t to be a convert as well, but wait .. calculation of 1914, and something changed in the world .. oh look there is the angle, the messiah has come we will now all climb up to our flying saucers “GOD” has prepared for us secular religion, while the world is cleaned out and we get to live happily ever after “YAY” We can all be friends and there is no more suffering only happiness.
You are either mentally weak or emotionally been abused. Yes .. i too love a world of no violance and killing of children yadi,yada,yada.
The more someone want’s to do good the stronger their will to do evil, hence people commit suicide when they leave JW. So you are hiding behind the book cause you have a tendcy to do very bad things. You need the scripture and an organization to keep you intact from doing evil acts and hence you think that everyonelse is capable of doing bad things and only the scripture can save them.
Your spirit needs refining. You live in a world of delusional fear.
Life is a balance “Yin and Yang”, you can’t escape it, either through WT society or any other religion. It is the nature of existence. Accept it. Life is a zero sum game - you will be dead and long gone and it will still be a zero sum game. Everyone has his turn.
Hi Moxie. My husband has recently become a JW. I myself am Wiccan, and have never pushed my beliefs on either he or my children. The past few months have been horrendous from seeing him change into a completely different person who not only tries to convert me by taking me to dinner with a couple of his friends from the Hall and then ambushing me by bringing me to the Hall without consent to be “shown” where he goes three times a week as well as conniving to indoctrinate my two young children, to which we had major discussions of not involving them in any religion until they are older, by letting me make an important appt. and not telling me until the night before that he was bringing them to a “meeting”.
Our marriage has completely fallen apart as he strays further into the society. We can no longer display the American flag, celebrate holidays or birthdays, much less do anything that we have incorporated into our lives for the past ten years and to which I feel are important. I have lost a voice in deciding what we may or may not do as a family and no longer feel a sense of familial importance as he continues to put his religion above his family. Any difference in opinion on any matter and he is bringing forth his numerous publications and issues of The Watchtower to “prove me wrong” or change my views and beliefs. He is no longer the man I married and I don’t recognize anything about him.
He is a veteran of the Military and used to believe in patriotism, as I still do. Just yesterday I told him if he believes that the government is evil then to deny his retirement and to quit his federal job, both to which he is being a hypocrite by accepting money from the one thing he considers to the most evil. He replied that he worked hard for his retirement and even Daniel worked for the government. So much of what I have glanced over and have heard just seems to be made up, contrived and purposefully confusing to fit whatever teachings and brainwashing agendas they use to bring you closer within their folds.
At the beginning of his desire to find himself and Christ, I supported him. I am no longer a supporter to a vicious and sometimes counterproductive religious cult (they fit the definition on more levels than not). I am living a nightmare which seems to be getting worse more so than better and find myself being a single parent of two children for whom I will protect from one of the most destructive and intolerant “religions” I have ever come to know. I honestly regret the day I chose to support my husband in his search, for the man I live with has become a stranger, a tormentor, a hypocrite and a follower to something that one might deem as evil itself.
I am married to a JW and we have a wonderful son together. I am not a spiritual person and my wife knows that. She doesnt try to push it on me and I get along wonderfully with her family, even though they dont have the same beliefs that I do. I was raised as a christian and went to church every sunday, but I now have to many questions just to pick one religion. I agree with your article and wonder about the exsistence of this life. Every group is going to have their own set of beliefs and they are all going to say that their beliefs are correct. As for our son, I have agreed to let them go to meetings etc., but we have also agreed to let him make his own decision on religion when he becomes of age.
Hey that was an intense article! Today I had an encounter with some JW’s and my friends I was staying with invited them in. I went to Bible College and took some evangelism courses so I recognise every “angle” the JW’s were using. My friends are young Christians and are very susceptible to knowledge coming from anyone mentioning Christ. I was kind of mad because I wasn’t going to let them have their way with my friends. I listened to them and took their points head on. It went in circles!
Ok, you came out of that experience not very religious at all. I am ok with that. That is fine. At least you got out and can share and maybe help people who are where you were. I think that’s awesome.
I sit back now and think about such sites as this when I was a JW. When I came on this site I was hesistant to read in a sense of fear. However I am a strong enough individual not to swayed in any manner but the manner I choose. I sit here thinking about my life as a JW. I often give thanks that I had that upbringing which helped o guide me into being the man I am today. I haven’t been active in the religion in well over 15yrs, however I have to tell you all that I still live by a lot of the principles that we learnt from the bible. I hear so many of you talk about being forced into the religion, or it being pushed on you or ambushed if you will. Let me ask you, dont you all find that your ambushed into many things in life? When you learn of things that can save your life, your job, etc. WE ALL try to save its in human nature.
The one thing I have learnt all these years being out of THE TRUTH is that we has humans can take things in different ways. What I mean is while I was in THE TRUTH and I believe it is the THE TRUTH, some people just take things to the extreme. Do you know how many times I was told as a child by my mother that she would not ever talk to me again if I left THE TRUTH. I believ there needs to be a balance in everything we do in life, some take things to the extreme.
Moxie you say you’ve healed over the loss of your family and being hurled out of the religion, I don’t believe that. I believe that you are just trying to justify your now existense to THE TRUTH, is that possible?. (no disrespect intended) I know your pain, I feel your pain daily. I often said to myself if and when I decide to go back to THE TRUTH it would definitely be outside the congregation I grew up with. I have had all experiences, being guided by elders that were hard on me, when I had nothing but good intent for those weary in the fence. I was publicly reproved for having a party and for invited some that were weary on the fence. However, let me ask you who do you think are active in the truth now? The ones that were swaying on the fence. I saw the good in them and encouraged them to keep good association, just like in all your cases, that’s all it was. You hang with a thief you will become a thief. DON’T fool yourselves! Like I said I haven’t been active in the truth for almost 2 decades, however my life was in a better condition or standing than it is now despite all what you say. I wish that elder was still alive that I had my bad experience with, so I can talk to him and straighten my feelings out with him. However I learned before his passing he had removed himself as an elder in the congregation for whatever reasons. You need to really be true to yourself and you will see the same. I really didn’t come on here to preach that was not my intent. I came across your page Moxie on myspace thought you were beautiful woman saw your blog link and decided to learn more about you. I thank you for reminding me of where I have been and definitely on where I’m going with this life of mine.
I commend the people that were out in the world and have found THE TRUTH and living it.
For the rest of us that have had the opportunity from young to learn THE TRUTH. Can we honestly look at this world we live in from the other side and say that it is a better place? I never noticed so much crime, hatred, I have never been so angry or stressed out from bills etc. Life has truly been harder from this side and that is just from my experience. For those of you that have felt differently, I want to hear from you. I Challenge you because I know and you know this is definitely not a better place.
I just want to reiterate, that a lot of us here that are in pain from The Society. We need to remember that we were influenced into negative thinking by those that have taken THE TRUTH to the extreme. Sit for a second and think about those that have been balanced, not forceful if you want to call it that. How beautiful are they and how you wish you could be in association with them. I know I have a ton of them that I miss tremendously.
I MISS JEHOVAH and talk to him daily, I have a few things in my life I still need to sort out. However I always live in accordance to what we learnt in THE TRUTH. It’s kept me out of a lot of serious trouble in life. I ask you can you say the same?
Be true to yourself and not in denial.
You weren’t hoisted out of nothing.
The door is always open, I know that and you know that.
Your experiencing tough love we all and I mean all do that even to our own children, whether we have children or will in the future.
It’s part of life.
Moxie I do commend you for taking the time to set up this blog.
I do hope to hear some more from you all soon. You are all beautiful people in which God created.
The path in life is the one that is in your heart and mind not what others want you to do. I believe that the Bible is a guide of life,read it once understand it and walk on not over and over again that you know it word for word,thats just self brain washing,read it again and try to find words that are not there is just expiring your imagination out so far that it will take you away from the real truth.
For examble the devels or satans number 666 what does that mean,
after looking and searching for the truth the bible says that whoever
calculates for here is wisdom ,the number of the beast, the bible states not the number of the devel ok..
Calculate 666 ok so I tried.heres what I come up with,, or close to it 6 by 6 is 36 .. 6 by 6 is 36 36 and 36 is 72,,72 and 72 is
144 get it.. the number of the remnant ,,the number of species of animals 144.000.000 the number of the beast not some fantasy in there heads about some beast called satan …..
Armageden well fact or fiction ..looking back who wrote about it.. must of seen something in the future ,,our lives right ..
What did they see an armagedem of wars fire and brimstone falling from the skies BOMBS wwi ww2 korea and vietnam ,,to them back in stone houses days on mules this would seem like the end of the world,they didn’t have cars then, cause the would have shit themselves, wouldn;t anybody……the new world ,the new order look out the window .Its a bit screwed up but its what we make it The new world ..
Remember those pictures in the watch tower ,children being thrown into the fire …somebodys imagination on paper , solders army boys 19 thrown into fires of wars sometimes 13 or so,,,,
The truth is out there ,in the bible or in your mind or in the wt or awake ,the truths in your heart so use it trust it walk with it you know whos allways watching you well now and then I believe ,The big guy is bound to be creating our future so why worry about it..
Love ya all whatever you believe in Ex JW for 30 years
Try not too force it all onto others over and over again ,it will hurt childrens future so be carefull ok all ,, STAY HAPPY ,,,,,
The Jehovahs Witnesses originated from Germany around 1914 so who started it at the time of wars mmmmm,In the king james version it states that this book should not be changed in any way no words left out or rewriten and so forth,so who wrote the new world translation must have read this but ignored this,there is so much left out including geneses chapters that states things you can eat and things you can so it was was written to there own belief …
Away from Jehovahs wishes and guides was it done for scare tactics;
brain washing,a way better than the jews lived,a way to get words out around the world to go against the English way as I have watched JW’s talk down the way the system is but use the money and wealth of this system,The end is near,ive been hearing these scare tactics since I was 4 years old thats 40 years of crap ,they told me it was gonna be in 76 then it was 80;s then 90’s then 2 years ago now its tommorrow, drop the end is near bullshit for fuck sake its been a broken record for too long ,get over it wankers,,,
12 years of meetings ,done the talks when I was 9 to 14 on friday nights ,door knocked ,wish I knew then what I know now .
I have allways been a believer in the way JW’s teach right from wrong to children and maybe its Germany’s way of life but scare tactics to kids GROW OUT OF IT so called elders thats the truth of it.
Last night as I have wondered who or what is a Jehovah so I looked up on sites to see what egypts version of Jehovah ,rah, raa or what ever our maker is,Jehovah was a sun god ,egyption looking man with a falcon bird on his head and a sun like figure following him around.
One that flies on a boat into a soler panel ,ok,if thats our Jehovah ,god help us all…Was our real maker CYCLOPES << could be he was three times as big ,,…
Moxie, you are awesome! You appear to be a hero among ex-JW. I commend you for writing your blog. For the passed 5 years, I have been trying to understand the JW man-made religion. I am now convinced they are all hypocrites, and just plain brainwashed. How can they say they are loving, and kind when they see non-JWs as “walking dead”?! I agree with the one’s who state the crap about Satan ruling on Earth! The one, and only All Mighty God rules, and there is only one way to him, and that is by way of Our Lord Jesus Christ! Word!
I am also very frustrated with my boyfriend of 5 years… this explains my search… He has been our of the “cult” for more than 20 years, yet he is so brainwashed, he defends the JW religion tooth, and nail!!! I am a believer of Jesus Christ. I try to live by the Words of the Holy Bible, ie The Ten Commandments, abstinence, etc, yet when this JW crap, (forgive me for judging), is defended before me, it makes my blood pressure rise.
I feel for Nicci… I pray that Jesus’s love fills her husbands heart, and helps him find his way out of the cult. I am with ya Nicci, the Jehovah’s Witness cult is an evil organization run buy the Devil himself! Amen!
Hi.
Excuse me if my words are not always the best, it’s just because english is not my natural languaje.
I’m a former JW.
I was not just a student (many people confuse a student with a baptized JW), in fact, I asked to be baptized at a very young age, at 11 years old. I was really mature, and very convinced about the teachings. I was fierce defending myself at school, or
to anybody. My mom just supported my desitions, and sometimes I could see that she thought that it was ok if I failed sometimes. But I really believed.
I don’t have hard feelings at them, it’s just that I feel like a lost so much of myself trying to fit until the very last moment, when I decided that I didn’t belong there.
Only someone who has been inside from a very young age can understand the feeling of loneliness when you walk away. That’s why your words struck to me so much :
“My anguish today is different than it was when I first left the society and found myself virtually abandoned by friends and family both immediate and extended. At the time, as a teenager I found myself an alien of sorts in a world where I distrusted and feared just about everything. All of a sudden to find one’s self alone, without guidance and structure, without a listening ear or trusted advise, is a very terrifying position to be in. Raised to believe that the world outside the organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses is a dangerous place, one that is controlled by Satan and his demons, that people at every turn are dishonest and dangerous, I found myself isolated, detached and terrified. Today, I count myself among the lucky ones. Literally speaking, as one who lived to survive and come out the other end not worse for wear but actually a happier, more educated, and an emotionally stronger human being—others have not been so lucky.”
To me it all started when my sister took the desition first, and suddenly, my beloved sister was rejected. It was just too painful to me, to sit there and hear the announcement. That’s a side people don’t talk about, how it is for the family to sit there and face the rejection of their beloved ones. I was the only one there when they made the announcement, I didn’t let my mom go. I was 16. I loved her so much and she was undesirable to them. That made me to stop loving them. She was my world, and I didn’t want to be with someone that rejected her.
I just stopped loving.
When I came to the realization, I didn’t have any love left. Maybe it was the same with my mom and my other sister, because when I stopped going, they didn’t ask why and eventually I could see they didn’t want to go either. So my whole family stopped.
Nowadays, we rather be a family. I don’t care if we’re not fit to “salvation”, I’d rather be with them among any tribulation. We’ve been in very hard situations since, and we’re still strong. None of our old “friends” lend us a hand, and we’ve came out better people every time. It still was a very hard time for us, to be alone and learn to restructure our family.
It’s been almost 8 years for me, and even if sometimes things are hard, I think I’m a very decent person. I support my mom shoulder to shoulder and we’re closer that when we were before as part of the JWs. We trust each other and have a very healthy and communicative relationship. My sister has a beautiful brilliant and sensitive baby boy, who is my little treasure, and I cannot stop thinking how he would not have been part of my life if I had shunned her, like many people do to their relatives. My uncles and cousins did that to us, and I sort of pity them because they don’t have the oportunity to know us now, and we’re pretty awesome people, I might say, lol.
I’m now in the ingeeniering field, doing scientific research. Academics and science are a very important part of my life. I’m a productive and apreciated human being and I’m proud of myself and my own achievements. I cannot stop thinking that at my 28, if I had stayed, I would have been pressed to marry and make a family many years ago. It’s not that is wrong, I want that too. But now I see that there’s so much more that that.
I’m not a “walking dead”. I’m very alive, thankful to be owner of my own desitions, and responsible for my own actions.
Thanks Moxi, for your respectuful and thoughtful point of view, it shows that being ot of the organization is not the end of someone’s life, it’s just a different path.
Love.
MyS
p.s. Ari, be strong, and take things easy. It’s hard at the begginning, but it all becomes easier.
Hello, my name is Jenny and i was raised as a Jehovah’s Witness since birth. I never fealt like it was real, like it was some big joke. Don’t get me wrong the people in it are good people. It’s the elders and the governing body that was the problem. I was molested as a child by a so-called brother. The elders pretended like it never happened, and hes still their to this day in the congregation with my 17 year old sister their. but not even my parents will listen to me because i dont carrie the title Jehovah’s Witness anymore, so i must be lyeing. My father is also considered one of them but hes beaten and choked me and molested my younger sister, yet amazingly… never been taken care of. I left the religion for mental reasons. I cant understand how an organization can say their the one from god, but allow molesters and perverts and abusers in the congregation, and not report then to the police even. My family refuses to talk to me for leaving. If you ask me, family is everything, who else can you trust, and a religion that tells you , you have to be ready to give them up for the religion is crazy. and is not the right religion. I have been apart from the religion and family for over a year now. It still hurts alot, I am shocked at how a religion can cause such problems. I am still very hurt by all that has happened, but i know Jehovah’s Witnesses are like every other religion, they want control over your life. When a personal problem happens in your family do you really want a group of men to know your personal sexual be it marital family problems , and for them to tell you if your right or wrong and publically humiliate you. If you do, its the right religion for you.
Greetings:)
Moxi, it seems you have either by design or accident given many folks something to consider; regardless, of which side of the line they find themselves.
I have personally experienced a “liberation”, for lack of a better word, fairly recently from this group myself. My mother, and therefore by extension myself, began studying when I was 6. I was baptized at the absurdly young age of 10. Barring a period of inactivity, I was relatively active for a number of years. I was a regular pioneer for 5 years, a ministerial servant for 4, and a Bethelite for 3.5. I lived and breathed the “truth”.
To be completely honest it was the service at Bethel that really started my wheels turning, and it was here that I can really chase my demise as a JW. I worked very hard, kept my nose down and just basically observed. When I did eventually elect to leave, I had lost utterly all the faith I had in the aforementioned religion. This resulted in inactivity when I finally did return home. Over the next 1.5 years I was married to a great woman, who herself was raised a witness. With the passage of a bit more time we expanded our family by 2 children. Both my wife and I were what many witnesses would call spiritually weak. We attended an occasional meeting, went out in service on an even rarer occasion. I could not shake what I felt, and so never really could become energized again.
Well one evening while I was at work my wife and some close witness friends had a bit too much to drink and ended up doing some regrettable things. Keep in mind I was not even at the event. Well when my wife confessed her actions to me, at first I was devastated. But even at this moment of complete blackness, I still encouraged her to go and confess herself to the elders.
In retrospect I can’t believe I had such blind allegiance and loyalty. When I had every reason to be consumed by my own feelings, and rightly so, I could think of nothing else but being true to Jehovah and the truth.
At any rate my wife, out of pure loyalty to me, followed my advice. Over the few weeks leading up to her meeting my wife and I reconciled, and I decided to accompany her as moral support, because I knew it would be emotionally trying on her. While there I was somehow singled out as the overall conspirator and culprit and eventually was disfellowshipped for something I wasn’t even at or took any part in. I was labeled an alcoholic, because I willingly admitted that I had been drunk 6 or 7 times in a three year period. My friends and wife even told the elders that I was considered a light weight as far as drinking, yet nothing would deter this unjustified wrath.
For months after I could think of nothing else, with my emotions encompassing every end of the spectrum. This all occurred about 2 years ago, and currently I am glad things happened as they did. Honestly I had left the faith long before the official removal. My wife, having witnessed first hand, how they treated me and the situation, left of her own accord. Our family is free of all the dogma associated with JW’s, and for that I am so glad. Last holiday season my children, ages 6 and 4, celebrated for the first time. Everything was quite nice indeed.
You see we are wholly committed to our children; they are in fact the one thing that saved our now flourishing marriage. Prior to all this mess, when the elders or CO would come to “encourage” us to come back, the only argument they would give was one that forecasts the murder of our children by Jehovah because of our disobedience. Neither of us could accept that stance, and this and other similar false lines of thinking were what continued pushing us further and further away.
Sorry to have rambled so long, but outside my family this is the first time I have talked about things:) I agree that many JW’s are nice and earnestly seek to help thier fellowman. This is also what continues to pull in people. It’s hard to decline someone who earnestly thinks they are saving your life. I have since moved on. I recently finsihed my second year of college majoring in biology, something likely not possible as a witness. My marriage is approaching its 7th year of marriage, funny enough this likely would have ended if we had remained witnesses. Overall life is better and I feel closer to the truth then I ever had. Sorry again to comsume so much space here, and thanks for allowing me the avenue.
Kindly,
Josh
hi there my name is andrew jones iv just been reading all these messages about your encounters with jw`s i myself have been studying with them for over a year now so i kind of understand a lot of whats being said. To be honest with you i never realy had a great interest in religion before i met them but i had tried many times to read the bible but to tell the truth i didnt understand what was being said not that i couldnt read the words i just couldnt make sense of them. then one day i got a call from a friend asking if his friend he met over the internet who lived in poland could stay at my house (uk) whilst she was visiting here i said yes of course no problem. He explained she was trust worthy as she was a christian so the day came when she arrived at my home (by the way i lived alone had just sepperated from my now ex wife) i greeted her showed her to her room she made herself at home and was very happy. a couple of days later she approached me and asked if i knew where the nearest kingdom hall was and acctualy i did not that id ever been there before so i said i would take her there when we arrived she asked if i wanted to come in i thought it would be polite of me to go in with her as she was a stranger and would feel uncomfortable being there alone so i went in sat down and to my surprise she didnt feel uncomfortable at all she was introducing herself to everyone and hugging them as if shed known them for years. im quite a shy person so i just sat there by myself not knowing what to expect then she came back to me sat down and gave me a book i didnt realse at first it was a bible not like the ones id seen before it was titled new world translations of the holy scriptures it wasnt while the meeting started that i realised what it was there translation of the holy bible. i was a little confussed as to why it didnt just say holy bible on it but i never said anything the meeting ended then lots of people started to approach me asking all kinds of questions as i said im a little shy so i fealt rather uncomfortable but i just answered there questions as best i could. then a few people approached me asking if i was interested in a bible study i politely declined as it was the first time id ever come in to contact with jw`s and i knew nothing about there beliefs. it was time to go home so we left then after that day i carried on going to meetings and a few weeks later started a bible study with an elder and his wife they came round to my house every friday night. they were very nice and polite people i fealt i could trust them before the study we use to talk for at least an hour maybe more about all kinds of things but when i think about it now it was mostly about me and my life who i am where i came from what are my beliefs and disbeliefs.But all the time i was studying learning everything they were teaching me i fealt something wasnt right but i couldnt put my finger on it something was wrong something deep inside of me was telling me something wasnt right. my emotions were tearing me appart i wanted so much to trust and believe in everything that they were teaching me im a good person but i fealt worthless in gods eyes if everything they were teaching me was true. i hated feeling this way i wanted so much to feel wanted in gods world. recently iv stopped attending meetings and going to my study i feel ill never be worthy to be accepted by god even though i realy want to be. im not a bad person far from it i believe im one of the nicest kindest person anybody could meet i go out of my way to help people and always put other people before myself. but since i started studying with jw`s i dont feel thats enough so im still in a confussed state at the moment not knowing wich path to follow so i guess all i can do now is pray to god and hope he`ll guide me on my journey to finding the REAL TRUTH. yours faithfully Andrew jones.
Hi Andrew,
Iread your comment with such interest as I was like you in that I was not born into the TRUTH but had a longing to find others who felt about God in the same way I did.I actually baptized myself in the bath one day at a low moment in my life and told God that I wanted to please him and was sorry for some of the bad things that I had done before.I meant it from the heart,not coaxed or encouraged - just from me between me and my God.I also asked if there was any religion that He approved of and if there was to show me the way.Well, i was in shock two days later when a little elderly lady knocked at my door in the rain with a bible in her hand.I really didnt understand what she was talking about and didnt even ask her inside the porch out of the rain.I later found out that she wasnt supposed to call on my door that day- it was a mistake.I prayed to God again that day and asked please don´t let these crackpots have the TRUTH.They are nutters,they let their children die and they are all old ,tweed hat and coat, sad spinsters.I have an open mind though and wanted to know what they really believed.These were not perfect people but I have to say that I loved that woman for 15 years with all my heart and I made so many real true friends that would have died for me and I for them.The only thing is ,it is the unity of love for Jehovah that keeps that all working strong.If you pull away from that light yourself for whatever reason you have to know that you will lose everything.You can sin a million times and as long as you are sorry you will be forgiven,but become like Judas after you have been baptised and your world as a worthy person will be taken from you.
I still question myself why i allowed myself to be manipulated and drawn in.Was it because of my oppeness and good nature?
I was “whole souled” for the first ten years and it kept me in a marriage for 15 years with a man I really did not like,but because I was encouraged to stay by the teachings -I DID and I sold my soul and real feelings for the price of a promise of a Paradise.One day I would be happy and my husband would not be there.!!!
Then one day the same problem at home arose again and for some reason i finally -snapped!!! I said I could not be with him for one second longer and that the marriage was over.I found the grounds for seperation were there, and I was free. I went on holiday and met someone who was not a JW and fell in love.Something for me at last, but ofcourse shrouded with guilt.So I sinned!!! I was sorry, but did not confess to the elders as I didnt really think it was necessary as I was going to knock the relationship on the head and which I did.I told no one about the incident even though I didnt like it.I talked to Jehovah about it and convinced myself that He understood.I covered it all up, and then I could not get the man out of my head and started to feel bitter that yet again i WAS DENYING MYSELF HAPPINESS.Then a funny thing happened and I accidently(honestly)lol, sent a message that was in my drafts on the mobile and it was to him.He immediately answered and told me how much he wanted to see me again and that he wanted to make me happy.I gave in,I knew that I would be disfellowshipped now so I wrote a letter of resignation to the KINGDOM HALL.I gave no explanatiin and I have never seen anyone since that happened 3 years ago. I still think about them all almost eveyday of my life and I miss so many of them very much and I know that they miss me and wonder what on earth would take me away.I was so strong always there for others that were weak spiritually,I was on the ministry,not just knocing on doors for minimum time.I had Bible studies and managed to convert many calls into lovely discussions.I looked after those that needed support in the congregation.We were so close and did so many good things together for Jehovah.My dilemma is : Did I want to be a JW because I was miserable in my marriage? Did I find the TRUTH and throw it away because at the heart of it I am just a disloyal person,a Judas Iscariot who hung himself after selling Jesus for 30 pieces of silver.The teachings do have flaws and soon all the mistakes in teaching will be uncovered.Paedophiles and molesters should be dealt with severely and children should never be put in danger but in this sick world there are so many wolves in sheep,s clothing and only Jehovah knows who they are sometimes. I am a genuine unhypocritical person and I love GOD whatever his name is but I am confused, and after 3 years still I am trying to find out if I am being honest with myself or just a woman that wants to live now and enjoy the life gift instead of waiting for something in the future that is going to happen anyway for all Gods children on the planet and not just the ones that keep on going to all the meetings and ministry. I still have the need to talk about Jehovah,his perfect plan and all those things that brighten your eyes and paint a beautiful picture and I hate war,politics,governments and organised religion but maybe having a secret hope for a better world is all any of us have!!May Jehovah bless all of you that have the patience to read my babblings and I guess the one thing we all have in common we are goats and not sheep!!lol. Jo
Oh by the way,the relationship I am in now is the most wonderful one.I feel so close and so well matched in everyway.We discuss my past and my new partner is not a Christian,is an open person and we have some great discussions about the bible.I may even have a bible study with him,although that would really scare me. I am so happy that none of my children became baptized because there is one thing on this earth that i could not do is turn my back on my children.I know Job lost 10 and was given ten more.They were not the same ones! and i just could not NOT be there for those I brought into this shitty world.
Have a happy day it may be your last and after all we have no resurrection so just be good true to yourself people and if you change your mind then be a JW again but remember no one is perfect and everyone is a sinner,and just be careful who you trust.There are as many bastards in as there are out of any organization. Why is it we have to ramble on about these matters.Still I guess it is therapeutic even if no one else reads this.
hey my names byron im form newfoundland, when i was about 14 years old i left the TRUTH. i wanted to have fun like everyone else in my school, i was the only male jehovahs witness in my school i staarted hanging out around with all my friends in school, i was beetin, i have had my nose kicked in three times, twon time i was knocked out i was called JEW,JEHOVIE, and everything else you could think off, all becuse i wanted to deny the congergation, i thought everyone was brained washed, hey BY… were all messed up some how no ones perfect.
by the time i was 18 years old i was into heavy drugs and drinking like a fish, so me and my so called friends broke into one house for money one night, i got caught and confessed about it my parents were really hurt and i was beeting up my parents house, screaming at them steeling from them even my ant and uncle, and worst of all my grandparents, i didnt care about anyone but myself and my friends, anyways 6 months after i got caught for break and enter, i had met a girl i was dating and i was starting to strighten up my life i spent all my time with her and only her, i was walking down the road with her one day and two police cars pulled me over and charged me with 9 break and enters that i had no idea about, i found out later it was my good old FRIENDS. they accused me of neverything they got caught for one year later i got sentced to 14 months in jail, i was in jail one month and i prayed to jehovah that he knew the truth and not to get me out but to help me out with everything and look over my girlfriend and family and i said soory for everything. the next morning my cell door opened and the gaurds told me to pack my bags your going home.
i said WHAT? WHY? HOW? he said your parents called us this morning and there baling you out for 15 thousand dollars, but you have to where a bracelet around your ancle for 13 months, i couldnt belive what was happing, everything i put them through and they still took me back, i know that jehovah helped my parents make the rite descion for what they did i want home and lived up to what i promiced.. to be good for 13 months. it was hard i coulnt leave my house only for a hour a day for a walk. but i did it a year later i got my braclet choped off and me and my wife to be moved to alberta for work. im 23 years old in september and im married to the most buitiful women in the world my whole family came up to alberta last summer for my wedding, even my grand parents came up and there in theres 80’s, it was wonderful all these people who i put down all those years and robbed from, they were all there at my wedding day, we got married outside in a garden becuse neither one of us were any religion really.
her mom,dad, and sister came up who arnt jehovahs witness’s
and we got married.
and i relize now only even though all of us have inperfections
it was the truth and jehovah that helped me through all of this. beacuse no one out in the world did. no im married over a year, i have my own painting company, my wife is a legal assistant. two dogs a house, a new truck a racing quad, she has a dirt bike, we travel everywhere and are doing fine. we have lots of family support and friends that i can finally call friends, are best friens here in alberta and in there 50’s but there the funnest people in the world. and yes the most important thing in my life isnt money at all.
me and my wife have been studdying with a couple of jehovahs wittness’s since may and we are very happy. im so proud of both of us theres so many easy way outs, but there for cowards. only cowards its easy not folowing gods word. but it takes a real person to witstand the preassures of the world. so to all you people putting down the word of jehovah no one cares, noy me not no one. you should be ashamed of yourselfs, your just cowards of the world, and you cant pass the test he has givin us. im not perfect and no one is, but im trying to do whats rite and i know and everyone else that knows the truth (bible) is the only thing that is rite. i might not be babtised for a while yet becuse i know i have things to change for myself and for god.
but me and my wife know the truth and are going to get babtised when we know were ready, what a blessing god has givin us.
and no im not brained washed. and no i was never shunned but the wittness’s. i lerned my lesson the hard way and i know whats out in the world to offer.. nothing at all. so people that say they were shunned. there just bitter. its like school if the teachers and the pricpals never judgeed or disiplend there students, how many kids would graduate. no of them would if there was no police or law. what would happen to your city or town? jesus went through all that for us at least have some respect for what blessing we are givin. and if the wittness’s didnt disfellowship and just accept everything, thay would be like the rest of the world. so if you people want the easy and cowardly way out do it, just dont lie and put down the witness’s. you should have better things to do.listen god says his true worshipers will be off the little flock, and thats what the wittness’s are. and thay will be rewarded with there sacrifice to jehovah. dont be bitter toward them there only trying to help and are not getting paid for it and for those people reading this…. these people that say bad things about the wittness rember are EX wittness’s taht have been brain washed by there own harts and othe imperfect people. no ones perfect and yes we all have are own minds, but just like kindergarden we have to do things rite if we want to go anywhere in life. same with god we have to work hard every day to accoplish what he have promiced us. so go ahead drop out in grade 2, or maby grade 10. your a coward and a failure. i never passed high school beacuse i didnt try hard enough. and yes im a coward and loser in that part of my life, but as far as knowing and following the truth for myself im a winner and i know im going to pass satans test cause i want to everything the bible promices and i know its going to be hard but hey WHAT IN THIS LIFE ISNT???
hey and remember dont do anything for anyone when it comes to got you dont need to impress anyone.
just do it for yourself and only yourself and for the only true god jehovah, so if you have negative thoughts becuse someone in your congergation. remember there not perfect and if there doing wrong then jehovah sees it and they will pay in the end so dont let it get you down. go to the meetings for yopurself anf god and talk to upbuilding ones and you will feel so much better and remember if your doing whats rite, jehovah knows and you will be honred wiht ever lasting life. i hope people that read this will stiffen there upper lip. shunn nthe wolrd and those of it and do whats rite in jehovahs mind and if your confused on which religion is rite, take your time and think about it and see which religon is the truth its not rocket science!! just READ
I too was raised Jehova’s witness.. i left it when i was 14.. im 19 now.. and i still have trouble.. My family is loving and doesnt shun me, since i live with them. But they constantly attempt to inch me back towards it. They seem soooo faithfully devout, sometimes i wonder if they are right.. but.. i just dont know. This world IS terrible.. and i really dont want to be a part of it.. but i just dont know what to do.. When i left.. i didnt do it because i found evidence that disproved their beliefs, but because i wanted to live a little… Can anybody helped someone being torn apart inside?
hey listen dont keep going with the world, its not worth even though i had to find the hard way first. i relize what a waste of time, years,lungs and body damage and strife i went through, its not worth it. you know alot of people say… what i did in the past made me the person i am today. dont think like that because thats what cowards use for excuses for there mess ups. even though if i never left the truth, i would not of met my wife where she was not a jehovahs witness, shes knows the truth now and not beacuse of me or anyone she looked into it herself, and now were looking toward babtisim. both of us. but i still regret the years i wasted, i dont regret meeting her, but because we were in the world our relationship was bad. it wasnt all fun and games we were both through alot, but because off jehovah, and the help of my parents we made it. and now we are happly married. these ex witnesses that say there happier without the truth, deep down inside you know there not happy weather thay say it or not , they wouldnt be swearing and saying nagative thing about the witnesses if they were happy. dont let anything get you down just listen to what you know and belive and keep positive things in your head and in your heart. dont waste anymore time letting these people and this world pull you further away from god. your 19 years old now, dont blow it, this world has nothing to offer, look at the news, drive down the road, look in books, talk to people, go to work… and you will relize that this world is full of hate where no one cares about no one. and the people that say were all goats, thats wrong were sheep and there goats eating grass from satan and his worshipers, dont be fooled by the world. all witnesses have there problems and mistakes but we dont follow the worlds mistakes and if we do, we know theres thing we can do to fix it, like keep going to the mettings for god only and yourself not for others, if you know of a witness or even an elder that maby drinks to much or curses or even lies, the best thing to do is confront him or her about it and say how you feel about it, not to keep it in and burst and leave the truth beacuse you think thats what jehovahs witnesses are like. some are and jehovah is the one who will judge them so after you confront them about this, most likely they will really thank you for it, and hopefully change. but if not dont stop going to the mettings and stop doing whats rite. pray to god every night to help you and he will. i know im only 22 years old, but i have seen alot of bad things in the world and honestly i havent seen ONE good thing yet. so go to all the metting. talk to ones that are really trying. and hey? who would you rather look up, to a witness thats not perfect making a mistake but is still trying to please god. or? someone else that is not perfect but does not care for jehovah anymore and isnt trying. were all imperfect but its the ones at the kingdom hall giving it all they got. not the world. its to bad how many people leave the truth because of stupid things like there talking about, i see some people at the kingdom hall that are probly not leaving up to jehovahs comandements, but at least they are there, trying, and like i said before go for jehovah and yourself and let jehovah take care of the rest. i hope you all can relize the world is ending soon, dont give up, keep trying.
After leaving something you have called ‘the truth’ and that is the basis for your whole belief system and values and relationships with yourself and others, there is a great sense of loss and pain to feel so alone and isolated in a world you have been taught is terrible and controlled by a devil. This pain is confusing and hard to look at, so it must be denied and pushed away from. Many people will get involved in drugs and alcohol and hard partying to push that pain away. They think that this is what the whole world is like, since that is what they were restricted from and how the society’s magazines depict normal “worldy” behavior. They feel unsatisfied and are without any deep or meaningful friendships in their life away from the direction and association of the organization, and then conclude and life as a jehovah’s witness WAS better, it simply must be ‘the truth’ because their experience of life without it has supported their conditioning.
When something has been taught repeatedly, especially from a young age, and there has never been any outside opinion that is critical of the beliefs allowed to have voice, there is such a strong bias towards the familiarity of the belief taught. It becomes the foundation for ones thought patterns. It is could be described as a loop, that plays over in the mind, ignoring and pushing away any doubts (because this is what you have been taught to do).
Even now, I experience these confusing loops, these opinions and voices that are very strong and influential that were instilled in my mind from 20 years of association with the ‘watchtower society’. These ‘loops’ of beliefs and “right” ways of thinking are very easily triggered (mainly from taught fears), and override my real bodily sense of reality and my own thoughts and feelings. When this happens it is very confusing and the ingrained beliefs begin to repeat these familiar thought patterns. In the society they call this conditioned brain loop a ’spiritual conscience’. The job of a ’spiritual conscience’ is to repeat what they have taught you in your head at all times, so that you ‘behave’ and do not question things.
I feel so sad to read about those who are confused, and are on the brink of being reeled in by promises of protection and a hope for an ideal future. What the Watchtower promises is a future that appeals to our basic human needs for community and harmony and our fear of death. But it is a manmade religion, just as it accuses other faiths to be. It has a written history, its birth and its progression make obvious that its womb was earthly and human, not god inspired. Read the old publications. Read secular literature. If it was truth it should hold up to any inquisition.
In my experience it did not live up to its own standards, and instead was the source for many destructive patterns of behavior and fears that persist for years after leaving the organization. When I compare my life now with what it was then, I feel amazed at the quality of relationships and friendships I have now. Never have I had such deep and caring friends, who have no requirements of me other than to be myself, not as self-imposed watchdogs to see if I make any societal slip ups. There is such honesty in my interactions, now that I can feel and think freely. I finally feel like I am really living, a truly alive human being. Not without challenges from the residual effects of 20 years of very strong religious conditioning, but with time and a real desire to understand, I am living the truth of of what it means to be me, a human being alive in this world of today. (Of course, the world today is another topic of societal conditioning and has its own brand of craziness).
Whew, that was pretty long. Its what came up after reading through all of these comments. I wonder if anyone read all the way…
Thanks moxie, for stimulating discussion with your post.
my parents are very active jehovah witnesses.please give it a chance..it is the truth-there is scriptures in the bible that state everyone of their beliefs….do some research(those in doubt)…look up christmas in the encyclopedia-PAGAN!! every holiday is pagan in some way…jehovah makes this clear in the scriptures as well…think about it-what word is in santa???SATAN!!! please,just do research on all holidays-including birthdays…you have to have some kind of faith and hope…look at adam and eve,it is all there for us to understand.jehovah is giving ue this opportunity to leave in an everlasting paradise with nothing but happiness…it is going to be wonderful to see my brother again!!!
my parents are very active jehovah witnesses(over 30 years).please give it a chance..it is the truth-there is scriptures in the bible that state everyone of their beliefs….do some research(those in doubt)…look up christmas in the encyclopedia-PAGAN!! every holiday is pagan in some way…jehovah makes this clear in the scriptures as well…think about it-what word is in santa???SATAN!!! please,just do research on all holidays-including birthdays…you have to have some kind of faith and hope…look at adam and eve,it is all there for us to understand.jehovah is giving us this opportunity to live in an everlasting paradise with nothing but happiness…it is going to be wonderful to see my brother again!!!
Thank you for this blog. I have an Auntie who is a JW. She is a single mom with two sons. She came by ‘the truth’ when the boys were pretty young and was therefore able to get them into the society. However, it turned out real nasty when the eldest son was disfellowshiped. He became ‘walking dead’ and we the extended family were shocked at the way the mom treated him. Reading through various comments I now see what this young man has been going through. I shall let him know about the blog so that he can share his experience and learn from others that the ‘walking dead’ are really alive.
Hey Moxie,
I too used to be a jehovah witness and I left about 3 yrs. Ago. I am 25 yrs old now and was in the ‘truth’ for about 8 or 9 yrs. I can relate to you on so many levels, Moxie. It was my decision to leave, even though all of my family (from my mom’s side) are jehovah witnesses too, including my mom and brother. I also turned into a rebel and started partying hard and even using drugs right after getting disfellowshipped. I did it because I had never really had the chance to experience the ‘world’ and what was out there. It was like I was living in a bubble…a bubble of restriction and suffocation, that is! So I went through that stage and then I went through a stage of feeling lost and confused, not sure if I wanted to go back or not. So I attempted to go back a few times after some yrs had passed by but I felt absolutely nothing. I was bored to death at the meetings and I didn’t feel the love from the brothers and sisters. Instead you had to sit isolated in a little room in the back while everyone around you would ignore you, like you weren’t even there! How in the world could such an action be christian-like?! Instead of making the ’sinner’ or the the ‘lost sheep’ wanna come back to the congregation, they are driving them away by acting in such a discriminating manner towards them. So I decided then and there that it just wasn’t for me and I decided not to go back and that was my final decision. My mother till this day, is mad at me for not wanting to go back to that cult she calls a religion. A religion that divides family, like it did to mine. A religion in which you feel like you can’t breathe and I felt like I had to be walking on eggshells constantly while I was around the brothers and sisters. I felt like I just couldn’t be myself…no matter how hard I tried. So I really don’t understand why my mother would want me to go back, even if it feels forced and I have no desire whatsoever to go back. She wants me to lie to God and make believe to everyone else that I’m repentive and actually want to be there? Makes no sense if you ask me. I remember one time when I was preaching with these 2 sisters (I’ll never forget this) and we stopped at a restaurant to get something to eat and as we were leaving the place one of the sisters sneezed. So being that I hadn’t been long enough in the ‘truth’, I wasn’t aware that jehovah witnesses find offense and aren’t allowed to say the words ‘God bless you’. So I very courteously said, bless you to her and they both stay quite and just look at me. One of them goes, ‘you know we don’t say that, right?’ I felt so confused and kinda thrown off at the fact that they got offended over those 3 simple words. 3 simple words that’re only to wish good upon someone. For some reason that incident always stayed engraved in my head. I wasn’t completely raised in the ‘truth’ my entire childhood so I had tendencies here and there to do and say things that I had done/said prior to becoming a JW. I can really say though, that I couldn’t be any happier to have realized it when I did that that was just not the religion for me and to have left at the time I did. Yes at first it was very hard and I understand people thatre going through it. And till this day it’s still a little hard sometimes due to the fact that my mom and brother are still JW’s. I respect their choice just like I would expect them to respect mine, which hasn’t been the case at all. My mother seems to think that I don’t have a relationship with God anymore, just because I’m not a JW now. And that I will pay the price somewhere in the future. When she would tell me that yrs ago I would panic and that’s one of the reasons I tried to go back (that and because I felt lonely at the time). But now, in the present, I do not panic at all because I know my own personal relationship with God and you can’t buy into the JW’s absurd beliefs that if you’re not one of them anymore and you don’t attend their meetings, that you’ve automatically lost your place with God and that His holy spirit isn’t with you anymore. That is not true. They try to make you feel so guilty…to the point where you think there’s no where else out there to reach out to God (ie. Other churches) and so you think that if you don’t go back to them, that you have no hope of resurrection and that God doesn’t love you anymore. Be strong and know that you will get through this rough patch and that God hasn’t abbandoned you. The JW’s aren’t the only people on this earth that love and worship God and Jesus. Seek out help, research, and do what feels right to you and only you…don’t try to please everyone else, otherwise you’ll never be authentically happy in life!
If you’re a Jehovah’s Witness and would like to find out a lot more about the truth that they are a cult. You can call this number toll free and they will help you so much. They really care about you they and were once in the group at one time for years and years. I pray you get the answers that you are looking for. 1-800-WHY-1914
The devil is truly busy everyone knows that disfellowshipping is in the bible jehovah witnesses didn’t just make it up if you are divided from your family you chose that to go living it up in a world that the bible states is passing away then it want be worth it but have your fun it want last I was disfellowship for 13 years and found no true happiness I’m back now and I don’t mind rules they protect me and I can find them all in the bible what I should and should not do so its gods law not the witnesses law I have never had greater peace come back to jehovah before its too late you are not happy out there I know been there
J. Brown
Watchtower Bible and Tract Society
Dear Watchtower,
I write to ask you if you would make no further contact with me. And contact means, no personal visits, no phone calls, and no emails.
This letter will be copied to Captain Mark Di Palo who is commanding 84th Precinct in your Borough. He has been contacted already with regards to obscene abuse received by active practicing members of your cult.
You are responsible for a great deal of sin, and have also caused many to stumble, both within and outside your ranks, and I am very sure this will be atoned for when the time is ripe, and the wages for a false prophet will be paid out in full.
And if you think you do not fit the description, then think again. Go and take a long close look in the mirror. You appear all sweetness and light on the outside, but on the inside are full of every vile thing that can be imagined.
You have destroyed the lives of countless individuals and families, You have also been the cause of the deaths of many due to faulty reasoning, and you deal with members in an tyrannical fashion, also in a very self styled and self elevated fashion that can only be described as idolatrous.
Do you consider this behaviour as that which reflects the will of God?
Is this the behaviour of someone who claims to walk in footsteps of Christ?
You have also set yourselves up to be something you are not.
You have abused children, have allowed children to be put at risk and abused, and you speak of abuse in a very elevated fashion as if it were nothing.
For instance, members of your cult even wrote and told me that they had murdered my mother and how it was when they did this. That they had sex with my wife and Family.These mails have been passed on to the Federal Agencies.
I have sought legal action, and seek a Divorce from my wife immediately. You can have her, but the divorce petition highlights all the issues pertaining to my case and your religious cult, and details Federal Police involvement due to actions that you have brought about.
And you have separated my family and sought to control the situation, but sadly you have now lost it. Like the other child abusing pervert Robert King. The more you seek to control, the more you will lose it and the more people will wake up, take the power back which you wrongfully stole from them.
Hopefully more in your ranks will by Gods grace leave as they go on the path to freedom in Christ. Christ came to set men free, not to make them slaves.
You cannot claim persecution or victimization, for you have brought this on yourselves.
Remember, it was you and members of your cult who were going to smash my mother’s head open with an Axe, it was you who wrote concerning having sex with my wife and family:
The details also contain how George Pickett wanted to empty the contents of his balls on my wife’s face and tits, and of course, how it was all about revenge……These are things that people do who are in your ranks, people who use Religion for the sole purpose of suiting their own selfish and self centered ends.
In light of all of this I would like to ask you what true religion (even those claiming to be true followers of Christ) would do the things you and your members do?……are these REALLY acts that hallmarks and identifies a True Christian of the true religion?
Your member Edmond Campbell said that Child abuse would continue until the Police step in and say stop, and even then you have your stupid two witness theory, that a child must provide two witnesses to sexual assault before you do anything.
Robert King is a lover of this theory too, it means you can do as you please and the Watchtower won’t do anything about it STOP IT. That alone is an abuse in itself, an abuse of peoples rights, and an abuse of rights which is totally out of harmony with God’s word.
You don’t know what truth is. You say you have never been wrong, but truth says you have never been right. You seek to suppress truth it at any cost, that’s been evident since day one and how your teachings have changed like the wind non stop.
Your teachings change faster than a whore changes her underwear, up and down and on and off. You really are Jezebel the false prophetess and continue to stumble many people.
You are a cult and fit every description of being a cult. You have mislead countless millions with regards your very flawed teachings, you have made false prophecy, and you even ascribe to yourselves a position of authority that does not belong to you.
Whether you believe it or not, this is going to be atoned for. You are no better that the religions you MOCK ON A CONTINUAL BASIS, in fact you are worse, as you say you do it in God’s name. But what intrigues me, is what Christ will say on the day when you say Lord, Lord….?
And your new teaching on the Generation is a joke, and seeking legal action against YouTube to have a video removed shows you up in your true colors, and this only goes to show that there was truth to the video that was posted by WTComments, who is an active member of your Cult. But removal of the video only lead to the video being reposted again, 100s of times. What are you going to do? Are you now going to take legal action against all of these people because they, unlike you, are seeking the truth, and are seeking to help others to see it? You are slime.
You also say that the 144000 have risen to Christ since 1919, but the Bible say this at all. The Holy Ones do rise, but at the conclusion of all things, both those living and those dead. And, the 144000 are seen with the great crowd here upon the Earth at the outbreak of the tribulation. Yes, the 144000 do not appear until the end time phase begins. These 144000 are not Jehovah’s Witnesses, but rather the remnant of the Jews who have been chosen, and they are seen with the great crowd, and they are seen scattered throughout the earth.
This is clear from Revelation and Micah where the remnant are seen amidst the people, so, its clear there is no pre tribulation rapture. So, that being the case, if the self appointed 144000 of the Watchtower have not risen since 1919, then where are they? Because this group does not appear until the end time phase, nor is there any talk of them rising to heaven. Nor are they part of the 24 Elders group as you propagate.
Like most churches you are preaching a pretribulation rapture that isn’t going to happen….so, where are your loyal holy ones then? And after all the evil Ted Jaracz has done, especially with regards to child sex abuse, do you think Christ would have him as a brother. If people like this are friends of Christ, then I sure don’t want to know his enemies.
This is just an example to prove the horseshit you peddle, but very dangerous horseshit, as it not only misleads, but misleads to the detriment of multitudes, how will you free yourselves from this blood guilt? You have acted extremely wickedly.
You have put the lives of countless millions of members in grave danger, even members of the public in danger, by preaching and teaching falsehoods, falsehoods which will only be to their eternal detriment and all because burning desire for control over the flock. But, some are waking up now, taking the power back and leaving your ranks, and we see evidence of this as 1.5 million have left since 2000.
You are clutching at straws now as the house of cards begins to totter, and it will collapse.
What will you do after 2014? By then, the generation, as you claimed that saw the events of the year of 1914, that very generation that would be at least 140 years old now,
what will you do after 2014?
What will you do when the whitewash no longer works?
There are also events that are coming upon the whole face of this Planet soon which you have not prepared any of your members for, this being due to your membership of Homeland Security’s already 79000 strong Clergy Response Team, which is affiliated to your old friend the United Nations. Have you told your members about this affiliation?
I look forward soon to your agreement on the divorce and the grounds for it which are being presented to legal representatives as well as Federal Agencies.
Of course, this should be music to your ears, as you are all for divide and conquer, the face of a strategy you carefully hide from the public.
You are now owing me outstanding monies and property, but all these details have gone to 84th Precinct. My wife and family who are still part of your cult should refrain from using my name as of immediately.
You and your cult members are to quit and cease forthwith contacting me immediately.
All and any emails abuse will only be passed on for processing. Your abuse has gone to Federal Authorities, and it is being pushed.
You will learn the painful lesson of what happens to those like you and your false prophet Robert King who plays with fire as well as plays at being God. Your abuse is coming to its end rapidly.
Please take the warning. This has been sent to the Police. I will not be coming back to you hate filled cult. You should remove my name from any and all of your files as soon as possible. This is no joke. This is a serious request.
It’s really quite strange how Robert King criticizes you on one hand, and then on the other encourages people to remain within the walls of your cult, and even join your false religion….a bit like telling people to go into a burning house.
I am glad to be free of you, and glad of the help that jwfacts and freeminds offer people so they can leave abusive cults religions like yours that have cost the lives of many, and still do.
I thank you for your attention.
Copy: Captain Mark Di Palo
84th Precinct NYPD
Wow, so much has been said here, after your very thoughtful post OP. I breath a sigh of relief to be free from this very sad false prophet. I don’t profess to have any answers except that this organisation only has weak rhetoric as it’s defence.
I do recognise though, that there are many who ‘need’ an organisation like this. Some are not capable of living straight lives without the rules and ready made community you find at a Kingdom Hall. So, although I would not in a million years recommend this ‘religion’ I can see why so many require it in order to live ‘fulfilling’ lives. It makes me sad, but it is what it is. I know many like this.
There are so many living with the very real ‘demons’ of this world since leaving the organisation. Sadly these shackles are imposed by man and should never be connected to any God (real or not). It makes me so sad that honest hearted people can be scared into a sect/cult for fear of literal attack.
Urgh, I can’t even express my feelings about all this - there are so many ramblings inside my head. I grew up afraid to walk without my back up against a wall - afraid of the demons, afraid of death, afraid of the world, afraid of living. I have slowly had to retrain my mind to stop the literal attacks, control the demons and learn to live with true happiness. I know many who have not been able to do this and can’t even consider examining for themselves because of fear of being set apon by the demons. It seems that so many can’t live at all, if not in The Truth - even if in their hearts they can’t become one with the doctrine.
How ever should there be the crisis of your heart and doctrine? This it seems is the theme of this organisation. It’s as if they feel it’s more important to have faith in The Watchtower Society, not in the teachings - whatever they may be, or however they may change. Blind faith in a man made construct on this earth in direct opposition to the teachings of the bible.
As a child growing up in the Truth, I was never encouraged to read my bible, outside the one or two scriptures randomly chosen to support a sentence in the articles. I had NO idea why I believed anything I did other than the same rote blurb I’d read in the magazines etc. How is that learning the bible? Why CAN’T we be encouraged to read the bible? Why can’t we have faith that we will not be deceived? Why can’t we have faith that God will not forsake us if we come to him? Why do we have to hide away for fear of Satan deterring the truth? How could he ever accomplish such a feat if God is in fact so almighty and keen on us achieving salvation? No, the God of the Witnesses is a cruel and unloving one. Any one to celebrate the slaughter of billions (even loved ones, neighbours, friends etc) is off kilter. Seriously off kilter. Jesus did not celebrate the downfall and death of any who did not believe in him. Instead he continued to show love for them.
I want to thank you for sites like this, and want to say how amazing the internet has been for the liberation of free minds and critical thinkers. Being able to discuss with actual research and criticism, is vital. Following without critical study is blind faith. And to be liberated from the fear and guilt and be able to drag our way out this strange psychological vice is something I am so grateful for. I am now able to love God, the God I believe - real or not, and know that in my heart he exemplifies love - not control and death. Very different from the God of the Witnesses.
And just to add, no, I am not of any religion or established belief. I just feel that spirituality is a part of the human psyche and I wish to honour that in myself with a God belief. This does not describe for me a way of life nor path, but just accompanies me with ritual, gratitude and reverence for Mother Earth and the blessing of our existence.
x
I think a thought, move in all directions, trying to see where the blindness has crept in. There it is right in front of me. To anyone who has ever been an educated member, it is that education I wish to address. Not the so called “brainwashing info, but rather, the scriptures you’ve read and currently believe. If you look with your skeptical remembrances, you really have hurt yourselves badly. You see, throughout the bible there is one thing that transended all the centuries it took to write the whole book. “What could that be” you ask? “What could possibly change my prospective about the brainwashed Witness who is writing this crap and claims that the answer is already in my head?”. Prepare yourself. Its the knowledge that Jehovah God Does Not care about the “Political Correct” perspective of humans. When people found it difficult to follow all of the commands he gave, they found fault,not with God,but with the way humans must be interpreting his commands. In essence “God would never treat people or give commands like that. The witnesses must be the ones making all this up and misleading everyone.”. Be honest with yourselves. Think about this. Jesus said that “GOD is Love.”. Yet, not only did he let men beat the heck out of Jesus but he was Flogged, slapped, spit upon, cut,humiliated,tortured,slandered,impaled, and betrayed right in front of Jehovahs face. Jehovah just watched without a word for as much as we know. If you looked at Jesus back then what would you believe about him? Would you say “Wow, Jehovah must not even care about this man?’. Or mabee “Jehovah must not be with him at all. He definitely isn’t with this guy because a loving father would not let a true son go through all that!”. The point is this. The reason Israel made the golden calf was because they didnt like the way Jehovah was doing things. Moses is up there too long. Jehovah isnt displaying himself in the way we need. In Essence, If Gods laws, organization, personality traits, attention, time schedule,and overall viewpoint seems to dissagree with my preconceptions, Then that must not be his doing. It must be the people who are lying. In reality, everyone will come to some point where they dont agree with how he is doing things,in all matters,but have to be submissive regardless. Now, Jehovahs sense of justice is the one that matters.I have to say this and I know its going to sound cold but its true. Jehovah doesnt have to be fair. He doesnt have to adjust to your thoughts to be Jehovah. He doesnt have to say or do anything he doesnt want too. The fact that he let Jesus go above and beyond the pain and torture during his mission doesnt change the fact he is love. Mabee your child needs a blood transfusion to survive and Jehovah says “No!”, does that mean he doesnt care? No!! Look what Jesus went through.Some elder offended you. Does that mean Jehovah rejects him? No!Look what Jesus said.You all know what they say “If you want to find a flaw, there it is. Jehovah has constantly, since the time of man,had to accept the fact that people dont want him the way he is. You cant change who he has chosen to act as mediator(Jesus). You cant curse his people for not living up to your standards! You cant chose how to worship or what to teach! You cant put Jehovah in your box.You must Accept what even Satan knows he must accept. It just doesnt matter why you have chosen to eat the fruit of knowledge of Good and Bad again. Change Imediatly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jehovah is Comming for you!!! Hes at nap of your neck.
I am not a Jehovah witness but I have been studying on and off for more than 10 years. The only reason I am not a JW is that I feel unworthy, they seem like almost perfect people they are God fearing the have better judgement unlike the people of the world. JW are very genuine people I have ever come across what I like most about them is that the reason from the scriptures many people believe that the awake and watchtower are JW books they are quoted from the bible they are just used as study guides.
You are making negative comments now about JWs because you are blinded by the devil the father of all deception. Continue living a lie that you are a better person for having cut ties with JWs but the matter of fact you are not. When you are in this organisation to some extent it shields you from the negatives effects of the devil’s world. You have discernment to know right and wrong and there is nothing you want more than making Jehovah’s heart glad.
There’s so many words in my head I could say, but can’t form them. If that makes sense. Everything you have written here, I FELT. I am a former JW that knew from the earliest age of a5 that this wasn’t for me. But what did I know, I was born in it, so that was my world. I even got baptized and then as soon as I did. I just stopped going. Something in me didn’t feel right. So I left at 19. But the guilt, the shame, then the anxiety, then the depression, then the thoughts of suicide, FINALLY took it’s toll.
I’m on medication now for Major Depression and Anxiety Disorder. Ever since I was six. Part of it is a chemical imbalance, but being raised in this religion did not have it’s benefits on helping the malady either.
Not all the Witnesses were bad. I love my family alot. They are good people. I wouldn’t be alive with out them. Some how I think they know I’m not going back anymore. I can’t dare tell them what I am studying now (that would be Wicca for you folks) nor can my brother tell them that he’s gay.
The ingraned FEAR is the wall that is keeping me and my brother apart from my family. It still hurts, but today I can bear it a little, now that I know my calling.
Anyway, I just want to say, thank you. Thank you for making me feel that I am not alone, or was NEVER alone in my feelings. That to me, is the real God saying up above that you are truly loved.
Moxie ….i don’t know if you are still ‘out’ of the ‘organization’ and/or reading these responses, but if so, and your family members are still shunning you, i send you a thousand gentle hugs.
During the Vietnam war, i began studing with ‘witnesses’ because i believed surely there must be other ways to stop big disagreements between peoples/nations, instead of blowing each other up.
And then came the day during the early 70’s, while Vietnam was still a horrific slaughtering ground, the ‘witnesses’ who i had
been ’studying with’, said to me:
“You have to make a decision! Your underaged daughters will either live or die depending on whether or not you accept ‘the truth’! They are under your authority and armaggedon will come anyday. How you decide affects your small girls! You have to make a decision before it’s too late.”
And so i made a decision and the next time they came to visit, i told them that, “it no longer mattered to me whether the watchtower’s understanding of G-D was true or not. Their ‘jehovah’ was not worthy of respect. I would rather my daughters cease to exist along with myself, then have them live under a god, who was intending to slaughter the majority of mankind, a god who, because of some claim by a ‘fallen angel’ needs to prove he is king of the universe.
These “friendly witnesses” then said I was a daughter of satan, who would soon be sorry, because i knew the truth but deliberatedly rejected it !!!!!
Moxie have a gentle day, hopefully you already understand that G-D is much sweeter, more powerful, more loving, more just than any deity the watchtower ‘organization’ can possible understand …..
sincerely norma
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