I left but my husband blames himself for it, but I feel it is suppose to be this way. Since I was a little child I just never believed everything, like living in a paradise having all kinds of wild animals in your yard so many wild stories we grew up hearing, God is going to give you anything you want. But it just never made since Wild animals belong free so how could I now own one?

I understand you miss your Dad, but you are going to have to move on without him. To keep hoping he will come around is a daydream, he is trapped and most likely always going to be, just like my Husband.

I am with you I do hate Religion but I do not hate God, I do believe that one day just as they say all Religion will have to come to an end because it hurts too many people. We will have a spiritual relationship with God and it will not require a building or a group of people it will require you and your heart of goodness.

It could be viewed that “humanism” took your family away, not his religion. After all, he hasn’t changed. You did.

You wonder how he can ignore “facts.” Perhaps he pays more attention to a different set of facts than you do. For, facts are not consistent. Different facts point in different directions. Many “facts” change over time, augmented or even reversed by fresher insights. I am very fond of the Max Planck quote:

“People think new truths are accepted when the proponents are able to convince the opponents. Instead, the opponents of the truth gradually die, and a new generation comes along who is familiar with the idea.”

People are not so rational as they imagine themselves to be. Humans run with a herd mentality, as Planck acknowledged. In the end, it is not logic, but an interplay of logic and heart. Perhaps make that logic and emotion. And it’s a confused mess of a world, getting more so all the time, with ever more conflicting notions vehemently expressed, so that it’s easy, given human limitations and stimulated by different ideas to come to different conclusions, which are sometimes tentative, sometimes not.

In the end, he likely realizes this, and doesn’t care to judge. None of us do. Nor is there any reason to. The Society has not ‘got him.’ They don’t ‘control 100% of his thinking.’ That’s paranoa. He respects their leadership because they appear to have a handle on something that nobody else does, that’s all. And yet, he also appreciates you because you are smart, capable, decent, caring, etc. And you are his daughter. And the ballgame ain’t over.

Frankly, I think cognitive dissonance is just a means of dissing the other side. For everyone is right in their own eyes. Therefore, the other side, we always feel, must be reeling from horrible cognitive dissonance. How can they cope? But, as stated, it all depends upon how you prioritize facts. They don’t all point in the same direction, and the human record of uncovering them is dismal. It would not be such a messed up world, otherwise.

Just guesses, really. I don’t know anyone involved. But I know Jehovah’s Witnesses.

So, the difference between you and you Dad isn’t smarts; it’s integrity. You insist that everything in your head be integrated–no logical conflicts or contradictions; he, less so.

What happened to you Dad? Life–especially modern life–can sometimes eat away at integrity. And once you lose it, it can be hard to regain.

The best thing you can do for the remaining “captives” among your family is to let them see (in your eyes, not in your worldly successes/failures) the value and outcome of having intelligence and integrity: Satisfaction, meaning, confidence, joy, self-reliance…the sense of making your own destiny and owning your own life.

It’s always recognizable (and it’s very evident in your videos). And it’s a thing that people SEE and ABSORB–even if they’re not immediately conscious of having done so.

I’ve observed that JWs have a dual personality. They are not consciously aware that their beliefs are partitioned, but a dual belief-system is the only way to survive holding fundamentalist extremist JW views in a modern secular democratic society.

If they admitted what they really believe, they would exit the sect on principle. The social pressure is what keeps them doing lip-service and “believing” to the core. Orwell described this in his book 1984, when Winston Smith is being tortured. The torturer holds up two fingers and says “how many fingers?” Smith says “Two” until the torture works and breaks his spirit. He finally switches into a good sheeple when he breaks down weeping begging to be TOLD how many fingers the torturer WANTS there to be.

The successful conversion process is to create this second personality which needs to believe what it is told to. And it believes to the core, despite the conscious waking rational mind’s ability to say “Brown Sugar.” Graig in Enderby BC

Because they are people.

No one is immune to this.

As an aside, we can admire the skill involved in any given occupation regardless of what we may think about that occupation.

If you continue to process things you’ll find that the fabric of everything comes apart. Some people know this at an instinctive level and avoid the path.

http://www.coldbacon.com/pics/kliban/bkboredom.gif

Others like myself were born to destroy every thought by taking it apart.

http://www.coldbacon.com/pics/kliban/bkidea.jpg

Might I recommend “At the Minds Limit”, by Jean Amery?

Good post Biorn, but on the above point, after 27 years of helping people out of cults, I don’t really see any correlation between the two. There are Brights who are religious and those who aren’t. What I’ve found is that people tend to compartmentalize their feelings about life and others, so that a scientist can be a near genius at holograms and an idiot at recipes or video games. I don’t think I’ve ever met an intelligent person that is smart in most of the lesser issues of life. Sometimes the more they concentrate on one thing, the more other issues are neglected. So they can be academic on one thing and need potty training on another. :-))

We tend to look up to others who have a lot of experience, and who have made a success of their lives, and wish to emulate them. Therein lies the danger: if you are not careful you will inherit their idiosyncrasies, their paradigm of the world, and even their bad attitudes towards others.

All the more reason to look at sound arguments rather than personalities. Put the arguments to the test. Entertain the critics. Let the defense have their say. It is a test of the maturity of the listener to be able to see through the personalities AND the campaigning, to the real heart of the argument. The bluster of intelligent, successful people is often adopted as truth quicker than the personal opinion of a gossipy retail clerk. We are so readily swayed at times!

Both religious and atheistic authors will have bogus personality traits and non-sequiter arguments. The same is true in the realm of theology and interpreting the bible. How to find your way? Study the ways people fool themselves and others; study mind control, magic, and journalism. It will give a good toolbox to protect yourself from others who may not even realize their own poor arguments. Then the real potential factoids stand out, and you can walk away from the rest. Just my opinion. :-))

Randy

Good luck in your life’s jouney

Your dad sounds like such a person.

For him to acknowledge pride in you even though you’ve rejected everything he believes is a step in the right direction.

As for not believing in a global flood or the age of the earth, I’m a Christian and a believer in the Bible and I reject the idea of a global flood and the earth only being 6k years old.

Thank you and good luck.