A Study of Comparative Religions…

This week I was approached by an anthropologist who is doing a study of comparative religions. The study is specifically focusing on religions founded in the United States and on a broader scale - the New World. The intent is to take an in-depth look at three prominent religions founded recently in the New World: Mormons, Seventh-Day Adventists and Jehovah’s Witnesses. The goal is to discover the principle cultural motives that people have for affiliating with these organizations.

I was asked to participate in this study and felt willing if not obliged to do so. I thought that I would share this survey and my own responses with you. If you are interested in participating, feel free to send me an email and I would be happy to put you in touch with the study’s conductor.

A Brief Introduction…

Some early anthropologists claimed that religious institutions are merely cultural forces that are formalized and institutionalized. This is generally supported by parents’ desire to instill certain behavior within children, these ethics having much in common between cultures. Generally, abstinence from sex, honesty, obedience to authority are all values which older generations desire younger ones to conform to. This is an explanation for cross-cultural similarity between religions.

On the other hand, many modern anthropologists think that religion is much more genetically founded, that the ‘faith’ common to all religion is a craving of our survival instinct. Armed with the ability to act unquestioned, primal instincts are much more dominant, and the Darwinistic aim to perpetuate the species is more achievable. Also, it appeals to commonalities among religions within cultures - such as animism, afterlife and the fact that destructive people like dictators and serial killers are almost always more religious than the common person etc.

So, as there’s a lot of theories for why religion came about the most important thing we can do to illuminate this debate is find out how religions are perpetuated in the now. These questions are meant to provide a better idea about your former religion and how it functions as a cultural entity.

The Survey Begins…

1) What did you like the most about your former religion while you were participating? Was it social, philosophical?

Since I was raised in the Watchtower Society of Jehovah’s Witnesses, I enjoyed the social aspect of the congregation. I was fortunate in that there were many young people my age (at that time) who were also active members. I also craved the exhilaration I felt when I was excelling, either in my studies or by my participation. The praise I received and the approval from my parents was very gratifying.

2) What’s the most difficult trial you faced while interacting with those of your former religion? Did you ever feel misunderstood?

As a young person, the most difficult experiences were often those involving personality conflicts, which are by no means exclusive to religion, but in extension of this, it was also difficult to deal with the widespread gossip that went on. The congregation was a buzzing hive of hearsay, judgment and condescension. In truth, I found it difficult sometimes to rise above that, and often felt a great deal of guilt as a result. Even more so, I found it extremely difficult to be the subject of false or malicious gossip.

3) Was there ever a point of doctrine that you didn’t understand or didn’t agree with? If so, did you ever go about discussing this with any other participants?

Yes there was. I was always confused as to how the Watchtower arrived at the date of 1914. I remember asking my Dad to explain it to me, and I recall that he did, but it was the one piece of doctrine that I just couldn’t make any sense of. Also, I often asked some of the basic questions that most children ask, such as: where did God come from and why did God create dinosaurs?

One particular doctrinal teaching that I couldn’t reconcile was that God created Adam and Eve only 6000 years ago. I remember questioning this because of the fossil record as supported by carbon dating. The answer I got was simply a casual dismissal of radio-carbon dating; I was told that it was not proven to be accurate.

Another issue which left me with uncertain impressions was: Why Jehovah’s Witnesses continue to use the most in-effective means to preach “God’s” message. Since this is their primary commission from Jesus. It stands to reason that with all the emphasis that was placed on it that they would maximize their efforts by utilizing other forms of media and communication, such as television or radio broadcasting, etc. I knew from experience how ineffective the door-to-door ministry was. Yet, when I asked why other media wasn’t used, I was told that in Jesus day ‘they went in pairs, going door-to-door. Since Jesus did it this way, we continue to do it this way too.’ I found this answer to be greatly unsatisfying since, by the same logic, it would mean that we would not use cars to get to our ‘territories’. I countered that if Jesus had television or radio in his time, he would most surely have used it to spread such a ‘life-saving’ and ‘essential’ message. I was told that I should trust in Jehovah and that he was blessing our work; that I should avoid thinking in terms of worldly issues and concentrate on developing my relationship with Jehovah.

One of the most vivid memories I have is from when I was very young, perhaps 8 or 9. I remember crying myself to sleep because I was so upset that God was going to kill every last person who was not a Jehovah’s Witness. I remember crying for my Aunt, who I loved very much, but was not a believer. I just couldn’t understand why she wouldn’t become a Jehovah’s Witness and I used to pray to God to help her ‘see the light’ so that she would be saved at Armageddon. This doctrine, that only an exclusive few, namely righteous members of the Society of Jehovah’s Witnesses, would survive God’s Day of Judgment at Armageddon, never sat right with me. I recall asking my Dad what would happen to the people who lived in far-off countries and remote places that had never heard of Jehovah? His answer was that the End of the System of Things wouldn’t come until “the good news had been preached in all the inhabited earth”, quoting a well-used New Testament scripture. Even still, I found this answer unsatisfying, since I knew that many people would be unfairly pre-disposed to rejecting the Jehovah’s Witnesses. Then again I was told to have faith in Jehovah and his ‘Active Force’ or Holy Spirit.

4) What is the greatest sacrifice you made while affiliated with your former religion? Now that you have parted from it, do you feel that this sacrifice was worthwhile? Did you, or still do you, expect to receive anything in return for this sacrifice, if so, what?

The greatest sacrifice I made as a member of the Jehovah’s Witnesses was accepting that I would be the subject of ridicule and embarrassment at the hands of my peers. As a young person, not participating in holiday or extra-curricular activities, going in the ministry and knocking on the doors of my school-friends, I was often put in extremely embarrassing situations. In school I was targeted by bullies and ‘picked-on’ because of my religious stance. In addition, since I was always trying my best to be mindful of my behavior and actions, so that they were in-line with the standards of the organization, I often found myself abandoned even by my Witness friends, since they did their best to avoid or deflect any ridicule that might have come their way for the same. Ultimately I gave up my self-esteem.

Now I believe that this sacrifice was based on fallacy and therefore not worthwhile at all, I feel that it was damaging and destructive. At the time, the only thing I expected to gain was a closer relationship with God, which coincidentally was something that always felt obscure or out of reach, if not completely unattainable.

5) Did your affiliation with your former church cause you to seek different types of friends? Were there those whose friendship you rejected because of certain beliefs? What about those who you dated, do you think you would’ve chosen them differently had it not been for your religion at the time?

I sought friendships with individuals in the congregation who were viewed as “good association”, namely persons who were in good standing and who set a good example in the congregation. Alternatively, I avoided association with individuals who were considered “bad association”, persons who had questionable behavior or morals, since spending time with such individuals could make you “guilty by association”.

In terms of those I dated or potentially sought to date, I would only consider young men who were exemplary in their service to God. Essentially, that would be someone who was a Pioneer (one who engages in full-time ministry) or someone who was a Ministerial Servant (one who has been given some level of responsibility within the congregation). My preferences were gauged by their status in the congregation and by their service to God. Had I not been raised as a Jehovah’s Witness, I would have been drawn instead to someone that I was more physically attracted to, one who could provide a good measure of financial and familial stability and one who’s personality and interests meshed with my own.

6) Did you ever do anything while affiliated that others who didn’t share your faith seemed not to understand? Did your former beliefs ever cause you to pursue something that you felt you couldn’t explain to them?

Yes, the list is long. Non-believers could not understand any of the following:

* Not celebrating holidays.
* Going in the door-to-door ministry.
* Not accepting blood transfusions.
* Shunning former members.
* Judging and condemning non-believers.

With respect to all of the above, and probably others I’ve forgotten to add, although I would try to explain my belief or stance I could never seem to help anyone to understand. Nevertheless, I wholeheartedly pursued this course of life, since I was raised to have an unwavering belief in these doctrines.

7) Did certain professionals such as doctors, psychologists or financial planners ever advise you to do something contrary to the teachings of your former church? Did you heed their advice? If not, did you feel you would be protected from the consequences? Also if applicable, how did others go about reinforcing your commitment not to follow these professionals’ counsel?

My ability to answer this question is somewhat hindered by the age at which I was a member. Since I was active only until 18 years of age I did not encounter many of these situations, although I could surmise a guess as to how these scenarios may have played-out.

I did however experience something to this degree. As a teenager, part of our high school curriculum was to participate in a sexual education class. I remember being in class the first day where the teacher instructed on matters of basic male and female anatomy, menstruation, methods of birth-control, or safe-sex practices as well as discussing issues of masturbation. Since the Watchtower teaches that masturbation was a sin in the eyes of God, I felt conflicted by this and dismissed it as ‘worldly’ teachings/ideas. That day I went home and told my parents about the class. They wrote a note asking for me to be excused from any subsequent sex-ed. classes.

I think that as a result of being shielded from this type of education, when I left the ‘Society’ I was under-educated and to a great deal, very naive about these types of matters. Thankfully I got the education through a community program once I left the organization, and so was not at a great disadvantage, although I have seen others fall prey to this kind of naivety.

Do you believe or feel that at any time during your religious affiliation you were in contact with spirits, God himself, a deceased ancestor or anything supernatural? If so, do you still feel today that those experiences were real? Were you encouraged to share those experiences publicly with others of your faith? If you believe now that they were not real, what explanation do you now have for those events?

Jehovah’s Witnesses do not believe in spirits of the dead, however, they do believe that Satan’s demons can masquerade as such or anything else for that matter. So I never had a ghostly experience, but there was a time when I thought I had a demonic encounter. I was young, about 13 years old, and I was afraid that some ‘bad’ music I had on a cassette tape was possessed by a demon, or that by owning this tape I was inviting the demons into my life. Needless to say, I was scared ‘spitless’ and thought I saw a demonic apparition. I proceeded to burn the tape and vowed never to listen to that music again, or to be so reckless in the future. I calmed myself down by calling God’s name ‘Jehovah’, repeating it over and over again until all was well.

We were not encouraged to talk about such things or to share our experiences, since talking about these things could be another trigger or invitation for the demons to pester and torment us, even still that did not always stop us. We would sometimes share stories and then feel guilty and even more afraid for doing so. Every bump in the night was a demon outside the window or in the closet, every tarot card or palm reader was a demon possessed pagan. This kind of fear and paranoia generates a troubled and highly agitated individual, nonsensical and highly superstitious, one who looks to their ‘church leaders’ for security and protection.

Now, I do not believe that experience was real, nor do I believe in anything supernatural.  I know that it was purely a psychological experience that manifested as a result of my guilt and fear. I believe the ‘apparition’ that I saw was the result of rubbing my eyes too hard and seeing spots—I’m dead serious. But in my emotional state, I believed it was something more malicious.

9) Were you encouraged during meetings to publicly express belief in the organization’s doctrine? Was there a specific hierarchical station you were required to meet before you were allowed to do so? If not, were there phrases that were said in the same way by those who participated?

Yes, the purpose of the Organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses is to preach and spread the message of God’s kingdom. We were trained from infancy to accept and repeat the teachings of the Watchtower. As long as you were in ‘good standing’ in the congregation, and did not lose your privileges (for some type of misconduct) you were expected to be out in the ministry as well as regularly commenting and participating at weekly meetings.

Congregations have a ‘Theocratic Ministry School’ in which ‘publishers’ (or individuals who turn in timesheet records of their ministry) are enrolled. You are assigned a topic and given a particular item to work on, such as use of gestures, or voice modulation, etc. School parts start at 5 minutes in length and while men may progress to be assigned more in-depth subjects and longer time allowance, women are not permitted to go beyond the 5 minute segment. Further, women are not allowed to speak directly to the congregation, but rather, they deliver their presentation by means of a role-play situation where they are speaking to another woman. In the case that a man is not present and a woman is forced to speak directly to a congregation of all female, or some u baptized men, she must cover her head with something. I’ve seen women use hats, scarves, once a sweater.

10) What was the role of ceremonies in your former religion? Was it required of a participant to attain to a certain stature within the church before he was allowed to participate? Were there certain ceremonies that you aspired to participate in, but never got the chance? What is your view of these ceremonies now that you no longer affiliate with your church?

The only ceremony that the Watchtower sanctioned was the celebration of the memorial of Christ’s death. In this ceremony, a presentation (or sermon) was given followed by wine and bread being passed around the congregation. However, for the most part, no one partook of these emblems. The Jehovah’s Witnesses believe that the majority of the followers are of the ‘Great Crowd’ and have a hope of being resurrected to life on a paradise earth, whereas  there is only a ‘Small Flock’ of ‘Other Sheep’ namely 144,000 who have the hope of serving in heaven with Christ as co-rulers. Only the remaining (or still-living) individuals of this group are permitted to eat the bread and drink the wine. These people wore no outward symbol of their having been ‘chosen’ but rather participated because they had ‘experienced’ a heavenly calling.

My view is that the memorial has now turned into the largest annual recruitment event for the Watchtower Society of Jehovah’s Witnesses. I believe that individuals who believe they have this heavenly hope, are either mentally unstable and believe in a delusion, or are trying to gain some level of notoriety within the congregation. Ultimately I think it’s a sad farce.

11) What was the death ceremony like in your former religion? Did you ever have someone close to you die and be involved in this ceremony? Now that you are not affiliated anymore, what is your view of that ceremony and of death in general? Do you still believe in an ‘afterlife’?

If you are referring to a funerary service, the Witnesses did not hold funerals, but rather a simple memorial service; though what the difference is I couldn’t say. At a memorial there is a speech or sermon given which only very briefly touches on the individual who has passed. Rather, it focuses on reinforcing the Watchtower’s doctrine, specifically with reference to their earthly hope of a resurrection. I personally feel offended by these ceremonies since they are more like a recruitment session, and in my opinion show very little respect for the deceased. I am offended that they don’t speak more about the individual’s life, family and accomplishments.

I do not believe in an afterlife. I am an Atheist. I believe that when you die, you become non-existent, just like it was before you were born.

12) What was the event that made you realize that you no longer wanted to affiliate with your former church? How long did you persist in these thoughts before you stopped participating? Did you ever discuss your desire to disaffiliate with other participants? If so, are they still friends today?

There were many things that cumulatively lead to my departure from the Jehovah’s Witnesses. The short answer is that along with some doubts that I had, I also started to witness shocking, hypocritical and corrupt behavior within the congregation. I gradually slowed my attendance and then stopped going altogether. After 6 months I received a voicemail from a congregation elder, saying that since I had refused repeated invitations to speak with the elders, that I was henceforth to be disfellowshipped from the congregation and that that announcement would be made at the next meeting.

I never discussed my desire to leave with anyone else. After I stopped attending I was visited by friends and family members, all issuing ultimatums that if I left I could no longer associate with them and that I would be cut-off from God’s Holy Spirit.

I no longer have any relationships with any active members whether they were friends or family. They were true to their word and shunned me as a result of my disassociation and subsequent disfellowshipping.

13) What was the greatest obstacle you faced in going through with your disaffiliation? Were there family members who still desired to participate after you had stopped? What is your relationship to them today?

There were several obstacles that I faced as a result of being disfellowshipped from the congregation. By far the most challenging was being shunned by my friends, but more significantly, by my family. As a young woman of only 18 I was virtually alone in the world without any kind of support network. I was extremely naive because of my sheltered upbringing and had to make it 100% on my own. Again, I have no relationship with any active members to this day. Even my family now refuses to speak with me at all. This is a situation that worsened after I began to speak out about my experiences as a member of this religion.

14) Were you married during the time of your disaffiliation? If so, are you still married today? Do you feel that your marriage was formed under the presumption of religious participation by either party at any given time?

No I was not married at the time of my disfellowshipping, nor am I married today. The rest of these questions are inapplicable for my circumstances.

15) How vocal do you feel you are about your disaffiliation? Why have you chosen to speak out or not to speak out?

I was virtually silent for 8 years after my disfellowshipping. I chose to speak out for two reasons. One, I realized that I harbored a great deal of frustration, sadness and anger over what I when through. This caused depression, anxiety and other socially inhibiting problems. So I began to write a blog as a means to express myself, I suppose it was a type of therapy. The second reason I chose to speak out in a more vocal manner was because I realized that there are many thousands of people who have shared my experiences and were suffering the same way I was. I found that by sharing my story, I was also bringing comfort to some of these individuals. This too became a kind of healing for me, I found great comfort myself in being able to help others in any small way. Further still, I realized that my silence was not doing anyone any good. Through my silence I was protecting the organization that had caused my family and myself so much pain and sadness. Although I know that my speaking out hurts my family, I refuse to protect the Watchtower any longer.

16) Have you adopted any other belief system since your disaffiliation? What were the criteria you used to make the choice to affiliate? Were they the same or different from the criteria by which you chose affiliation with your former religion?

No, I never adopted another religious belief system. Through the course of the last 9 years I have studied and researched many other religions, never finding truth or satisfaction in any of them. I moved further away from a belief in God, wondering if he even existed and if he did, thought that he most likely had nothing to do with the earth or any of its religions. It was about a year ago that I began to look to science for answers about our nature and the world around us. As a result I have abandoned any belief in God’s existence and am now an Atheist.  I have written many articles on my blog detailing this journey and transition. Ultimately, I was never given a choice with respect to by belief in the Watchtower Society. When I left I sought to find the truth for myself, whether it indeed was the Watchtower or some other religion. What I found after many years was not another religion or another path to God, but rather that God doesn’t exist and religions are all without a doubt man-made.

17) How inclined do you feel you are now to form friendships and romantic relationships with religious people? Does this decision vary according to what denomination they belong to, if so, why?

As with many factors in finding a good friend or a good partner, it is often true that the most successful relationships are formed on mutual tastes, similar interests, and similar or complimentary personalities. While religion would not necessarily be the criteria to dismiss a potential friend, it could potentially lead to a conflict within a romantic relationship; I think it all depends upon the degree of understanding and mutual respect, or conversely the fundamentalism of either party’s belief system.

18) Have you changed your work and sleep habits since your decision to disaffiliate? Have you changed your hobbies or recreation? Have those you know commented on any change in personality? If so, what do they say?

Since I left the Society I have aggressively pursued my career, whereas within the Watchtower Organization such interests would have been a sign of spiritual weakness.  My hobbies and recreation are much the same, but I do enjoy a wider range of recreational activities now that I have more free-time to do so. Also, I can now engage in activities that would have been considered inappropriate within the congregation, such as going to a pub or going out to dance with friend, as well as engaging in charity work within my local community. Since I have no contact with any of my former associations there is no point of reference from their perspective. That said, I have been told by friends that even within the past year, as a result of my writing and expression, that I am much happier and seem more active and outgoing.

19) How long has it been that you haven’t participated in your former religion? Have you ever thought of returning? Why or why not?

It has been 9 years since I left the Watchtower Society. For the first few years I did on occasion think of returning. I now know that this was a by-product of being so completely alone and without any support network. Gradually, as I built a new life outside the Society, I found that those feelings subsided. I recognize that it was not about wanting to return to the religion, but rather it was because I missed my friends and family.